Author: The Wild Gems

We are all like precious stones. We all come in different shapes and sizes. It is when we are cut and polished that we begin to live a more radiant life.
The Wild Gems hopes to inspire you to live life to the fullest and to enjoy every moment!

Finding Wholeness In YOUR Story – Your Trauma

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Traumas in your life are the very difficult emotions that you processed alone.

Reread that, and think about that for a moment.

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A trauma that I have been healing from for the past couple of years now has been my adoption story.

I was adopted into a family with no connection to any of my biological relatives. I felt incredibly alone for many, many years. Discussing my adoption was taboo; it was as if I were an apple tree trying to grow in an orange grove, and nobody ever acknowledged that I was, indeed, different.

It wasn’t until 29 years later that I met any of my biological family. That’s 29 years of trying to process everything by myself. It’s been a journey—a lifelong one—and it still is.

When I had my own child, I truly believed I could finally put my adoption story behind me. I thought I wouldn’t feel so alone anymore. And, in a way, having my daughter did bring healing, but only temporarily.

Then, when my daughter was 10 months old, we fostered and later adopted my sister-in-law’s daughter, who was just one year old at the time. While fostering her, so many repressed emotions resurfaced—emotions I had buried deep within myself for decades. They came flooding back, sending me into a depression. I couldn’t escape my story. I couldn’t escape myself. I couldn’t escape “adoption/adoptee/adopted” And I hated it.

I didn’t want to feel this pain anymore, but I had no idea what to do. I just knew I could no longer ignore this. Now having a new type of adoption story with actually adopting I knew this had to be dealt with. And I knew if I wanted to be the mother that I wanted to be to my children then I had work to do.

Eventually, I surrendered and accepted that this really was a part of my identity—not my whole self, but a huge part of me. And that’s when the healing journey began.

The traumas we experience cannot be erased, but we can learn how to identify and understand them. Only then can we begin to heal from them.

One way to begin healing is by acknowledging what you went through, validating your experience, and sharing it with others. It’s not enough to think about it in silence. You need to talk about it. Take what’s swirling in your mind and articulate it into words.

For years, I thought I was alone, but I’ve learned through my own journey that I never really was. I’ve also learned how many people out there suffer in silence, just as I did.

I want you to know: You are not alone. There’s so much strength in sharing your truth, in finding connection through the pain. Healing doesn’t mean erasing your story; it means finally allowing yourself to be seen, to be heard, and to be whole.

Becoming Mindful Of Your Emotions

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Emotions are a natural part of us, but they don’t define our entire being.

I once heard an analogy that made me chuckle: Emotions are like children. You don’t want them driving the car, but you also don’t want to stuff them in the trunk. This humorous but insightful metaphor reminds us of the delicate balance between acknowledging our emotions and letting them take over.

It’s crucial, maybe even vital, to validate our emotions. A simple but powerful step is naming what you’re feeling out loud: “I am angry because I feel like nobody is listening to me in this house.” Saying it out loud gives the emotion space to exist without consuming you. It’s like holding it up to the light and saying, “I see you, and I understand why you’re here.”

Too often, we seek validation for our emotions from others because we haven’t been taught how to validate ourselves. But here’s the truth: no one else can fully understand your inner world the way you do. Learning to recognize and name your emotions helps you build a bridge between feeling and understanding.

When we fail to acknowledge our emotions, they can turn inward, manifesting as self-blame, self-doubt, or even shame. Unchecked, they can become a storm that clouds how we see ourselves and the world. But when we practice self-compassion and emotional mindfulness, we create space for healing and growth.

This practice is also deeply tied to valuing and loving ourselves. When we learn to be gentle with our feelings instead of silencing or avoiding them, we show ourselves the same compassion we would offer to a friend. It becomes easier to navigate life with emotions as our passengers—present and acknowledged but no longer in control.

Emotions, however, can be powerful guides. Each one has something to teach us—if we’re willing to listen. Sadness might remind us of what we cherish or have lost. Anger can show us where our boundaries feel crossed. Joy reveals what brings meaning to our lives. They’re not the enemy—they’re messengers.

By taking this approach, we can steer through life with greater clarity and peace, no matter how strong the waves of emotion may be.

If we do not work on repairing and understanding ourselves, we cannot help repair or understand others.

“All behavior makes sense with enough information.”

Reminder: YOU MAKE SENSE.

When You Grieve

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We don’t just grieve when a loved one dies. Though many feel that’s the only time we are “allowed” to grieve, the truth is that grief appears in so many forms. Grief is, at its heart, a deep sadness; one we feel in countless ways throughout our lives.

We grieve over friendships that were once intertwined so tightly but have now lost their elasticity.

We grieve over romantic relationships, mourning what they once were and what they will never be again. It’s like a glass of water being spilled; once it’s spilled, it can never be a glass of water again.

We grieve over growing up, over life’s truths being revealed. We mourn our ignorance and innocence in ways we don’t often speak about.

We grieve over our children—their independence, their struggles, the way we cannot protect them from everything, no matter how much we wish we could.

We grieve over past versions of ourselves, searching for the joy or energy we once had and feeling unsure if we’ll ever get it back, no matter how many books we read or podcasts we listen to.

We grieve over our bodies that have changed, over the capabilities we once had but can no longer reach.

We grieve over change itself, in all its forms whether we asked for it or not.

It’s okay to grieve. I want to remind you that you are never alone in this. Walking through the woods of grief is often a silent journey, one we take while the outside world continues on, oblivious. You may feel like you have to navigate it by yourself, but I promise, others have walked this path, too.

I wish I had a universal answer for how to get through grief. I really do.

What I can tell you is that it isn’t a straight line. Some days, you’ll feel fine, even hopeful. And then, out of nowhere, grief will show up like an unexpected visitor—one who arrives uninvited and unannounced, leaving you unprepared.

In those moments, be gentle with yourself. Grief isn’t something to “fix” or “finish.” It’s something to feel and carry until it lessens its weight. Grief may never truly leave, but over time, you may find it settling into the corners of your heart, leaving space for other things; hope, love, and even joy.

Grief is the echo of something meaningful, a reminder of how deeply we’ve loved, how deeply we’ve lived. And while it’s heavy, it’s also proof that you’re human, that you’ve cared, that you’re still here; growing and walking forward, one step at a time.

Give yourself permission to grieve. Give yourselves permission to cry. Give yourself permission to close off the world for a bit. Give yourself permission to not have to explain. Give yourself permission to heal. Give yourself permission to not be okay.

Your Truth May Not Be The Same For Another

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I was listening to a podcast recently, and the host shared an interesting perspective: he believed that life often makes us repeat certain patterns or lessons until we finally “get it.” It was a humbling realization for him, but his guest gently challenged him, saying, “That might be true for you, but it doesn’t mean it’s the truth for everyone.”

This idea really struck me. How often do we assume that what feels true for us must automatically apply to everyone else?

It reminded me of a story I came across that perfectly illustrates this idea:

There was a monkey who lived in a forest tree by a river. One day, the monkey saw a fish swimming in the river and thought the fish was struggling. Feeling compassionate, the monkey resolved to save it. It climbed down the tree, scooped the fish out of the water, and placed it gently on a branch. The fish flapped violently and soon died. The monkey was heartbroken and confused—it had only wanted to help.

This story offers such a powerful lesson. The monkey, out of good intentions, misjudged the situation because it viewed the fish’s needs through its own perspective. It assumed that what was natural and necessary for itself—living on land and breathing air—must also apply to the fish. In trying to help, the monkey unknowingly caused harm, simply because it didn’t take the time to truly understand the fish’s environment and needs.

How often do we, with the best intentions, do the same? We may impose our beliefs, values, or ways of living onto others, assuming they must see the world as we do. But the truth is, each of us is shaped by our unique environment, experiences, and perspective. What feels like “truth” for one person may not resonate at all for another.

This story invites us to step back and ask: Am I truly understanding someone else’s experience, or am I projecting my own onto them? Am I listening, or am I assuming?

The beauty of the world lies in its diversity—not just in nature but in thought, belief, and experience. By cultivating empathy and recognizing that we all have our own “water” or “land” to thrive in, we can approach others with a deeper sense of understanding and respect.

Next time you’re tempted to “help” someone or share what you think they need to hear, pause. Consider whether you’re seeing their life through their eyes—or through your own.

Because the truth is, your truth may not be the same truth for another.

Clutter-Free Gift Ideas: Meaningful Presents That Leave No Trace

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Experiences

1. Event tickets – Concerts, theater, sports games, or festivals.

2. Memberships or subscriptions – Online learning platforms, streaming services, or meditation apps.

3. Classes or workshops – Cooking, art, yoga, or dance lessons.

4. Adventure experiences – Hot air balloon rides, ziplining, or escape rooms.

5. Day passes – Spas, amusement parks, or museums.

Services

6. Massage or spa treatments – Gift a massage, facial, or pedicure.

7. Personal care services – Haircuts, manicures, or grooming.

8. Household help – Cleaning, organizing, or yard care services.

9. Meal delivery services – Prepped meal kits or food delivery gift cards.

10. Coaching sessions – Life, fitness, or career coaching.

Digital Gifts

11. E-books or audiobooks – A digital book tailored to their interests.

12. Online courses – Skillshare, MasterClass, or Coursera.

13. Music or podcast subscriptions – Spotify, Apple Music, or Audible.

14. Custom playlists – Curate a playlist of songs that remind you of them.

15. Photo slideshow or video montage – Share cherished memories digitally.

Charitable Gifts

16. Donation in their name – To a cause they care about.

17. Adopt an animal – Symbolic adoptions through wildlife funds.

18. Support local artists or communities – Fund a project or artisan.

Time and Memories

19. Quality time together – Plan a day out, a hike, or a picnic.

20. Personalized experiences – Write a heartfelt letter or create a digital scrapbook.

21. Offer your skills – Teach them something or help with a project.

Invisible Hands Everywhere

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Everything has roots—everything.

Think about a tree for a moment. You see its sturdy trunk, sprawling branches, and vibrant leaves. But the roots? Hidden beneath the surface, they work tirelessly, anchoring and feeding the tree. The meals we eat every day are no different—each one has roots, invisible yet essential.

Take your next meal, for example—perhaps eggs and toast. At first glance, it’s just breakfast. But look closer. Behind that plate lies a network of effort and care. The farmers who gathered the eggs, the workers who milled the grains, the drivers who transported the ingredients, the cashiers who stocked the shelves—all of them played a role in bringing it to your table.

We often think of eating as a solitary act, but it’s anything but. Every bite connects us to countless others.

One morning, as I sat down to eat, this thought hit me. My meal, as simple as it was, had been touched by so many hands. People I’d never met had spent their time and energy to make it possible. I couldn’t help but feel grateful. The awareness of those invisible hands changed my perspective.

We live in a world where convenience often overshadows connection. Food appears so effortlessly that it’s easy to forget the work behind it. But when you take the time to see the roots—the people, the processes, the labor—it deepens your appreciation.

Every hand belongs to someone with their own struggles, joys, and dreams. Thinking about this transforms an ordinary act into a moment of connection and gratitude.

The next time you eat, pause for a moment. Consider the roots of your meal. Think about the farmers, the drivers, the stockers, and everyone in between. When you acknowledge these invisible hands, even a simple meal becomes extraordinary.

This mindfulness reminds us that we’re never truly alone. Behind every bite is a story of shared humanity, and with it, a reason to be thankful.

A Few Dashes Of Extra Courage

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What is one thing you would change about yourself?

If changing something about myself were as simple as adding a pinch of salt, I’d sprinkle in a little more courage.

I wouldn’t mind adjusting that part of me just a bit, because there’s a small part of me that envies those who seem fearless. I love watching skydiving videos, cliff jumpers, and people who travel extensively.

But I don’t enjoy flying, heights make me uneasy, and you won’t catch me on rides that drop or flip. Snorkeling is fine, but scuba diving freaks me out.

And as much as I’d dream of visiting space, I know I probably wouldn’t go, even if I had the chance. But man how I wonder about the overview effect — the feelings of awe when astronauts see earth in space for the first time.

I did try parasailing once—it was terrifying. Oh, and I also don’t really like elevators.

I do wish I had the courage though to skydive, hang glide, or try all those thrilling adventures, but that’s just not who I am. And I’ve come to accept that about myself.

That said, I do understand that the feelings and sensations we chase through these experiences can be discovered in other ways. I’m just trying to figure out what that looks like for me.

Maybe there wouldn’t be so much controversy when it comes to meat

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What are your feelings about eating meat?

I don’t have much of an opinion whether a person chooses to or chooses not to eat meat.

What I do have an opinion about is how meat is treated.

There are many indigenous communities out there who honor the animal before the animal is then sacrificed. This is worth reading about if you’ve never heard of this before.

I believe I read somewhere that the Buffalo is especially sacred. And every part of the buffalo is used in someway.

I can appreciate that there is thanks and respect given to the animal before it is consumed.

I wish that practice was implemented vs. the sad truth.

Imagine if we were more open to letting the indigenous teach us their ways. Maybe there wouldn’t be so much controversy when it comes to meat.

Protect Their Light: A Call to Kindness for Children

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Not even children get a free pass when it comes to “life.” There are so many children out there who have had to grow up far too soon, and it’s truly heartbreaking.

Too often, we overlook children and assume they don’t have life experience, but believe me when I tell you there are children who have been through more than many adults.

Life is not fair, this we know. But it’s especially unfair to children. They deserve so much more than what life often hands them.

Never look down on them. Be there for them. Help them navigate their pain. Not all children have the right words yet for what they feel. Sometimes they don’t need your advice, they just need you to listen. Offer your hand of guidance. Let them know they are not alone.

There is so much we can learn from children. They have a unique way of seeing the world, and their resilience is nothing short of remarkable. And though life is what it is, we have to try to protect them. We have to try to preserve their innocence as long as we can.

Children deserve the chance to stay children. They deserve to dream, to feel safe, and to be surrounded by love. When we protect their light, we allow them to shine in ways that make this world a better place.

When we show them love and understanding, we’re not only shaping their future but also shaping a kinder world for all of us.