Tag: thoughts

We Can Live In A Better World With A Simple Act

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I think something we all think about from time to time is our purpose in life.

Not just our purpose, but we wonder how we are contributing to this world. We ask ourselves what impact am I making, or how can I make an impact? I have an answer.

Kindness.

We reciprocate kindness. It’s something so simple yet extremely powerful.

Can you imagine a world where people were just more kind. Kind as in soft hearted, thoughtful, helpful, loving, full of compassionate and sincerity.

You hear about acts of kindness, you hear how contagious it is but what is an act of kindness really.

An act of kindness is a selfless act you do for someone or something for the mere fact of making them feel good and expecting nothing in exchange. That’s a very simple explanation.

In result of these actions, these acts of kindness, you feel good. You feel really good, you feel positive, you feel and you know you are making an impact in someway. If you are unaware of this, YOU ARE MAKING A DIFFERENCE with every kind thing that you do.

You don’t need to know the results of whatever good acts of kindness you are doing because in your heart you know these good deeds are impactful and will go further then you can possibly imagine.

Kindness is extremely contagious. Which is why we need to be more kind to one another.

Even just witnessing an act of kindness makes you feel good! Have you ever noticed that?

In performing more acts of kindness you are spreading magic.

When someone does something nice for YOU, don’t you feel a need and a desire to reciprocate it. You want to return the gesture because you keep in mind how good it made you feel and you want to pay it forward.

All this kindness feels so good because it releases that love hormone you’ve heard about, oxytocin.

A hormone that is released through intimacy, hugging, childbirth, and that’s just to name a few! Overall I think we all can agree it’s a pretty good feeling.

I feel like often we are reminded how cruel this world can be. Whether it be something we watch on the news or see on social media, or hear maybe on the radio.

It’s crucial to not let these bad things that exist harden your heart and to stay strong with your ‘kindness armor’.

Being a Mother I worry a lot about my children and this world they are growing up in. But I know if we are all just more kind this world really can be a better place.

I challenge you to do more acts of kindness. Empathize with one another and choose to love. We are all in this together. We are one.

No matter how big or small you think you are, you play a huge part in this life and world and plan. Lift those who are weak, continue to strengthen yourself to help others, and never give up on the vision that you have for a better place.

What kind thing will you do today?

Start Off Everyday With These 5 Simple Morning Habits

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Our mornings are what set the day for success, they set the pace for positive results, and they set our mood for optimism. Have you ever heard the quote, “Win the morning, win the day.” By Entrepreneur Tim Ferriss.

It makes a difference when things are running smoothly versus getting a late start and then constantly feeling rushed.

When we can win the morning we are setting ourselves up for productivity. You are more likely to feel a sense of accomplishment through out your day when you have a great morning.

Think for a quick moment, what do your mornings look like? How are you shaping them daily.

Would you describe the start of your day as relatively consistent or a tad sporadic? I guess it kind of depends if you went out for margaritas the prior the night before or not. But on a daily basis what’s your routine look like?

If you don’t have a morning routine I highly encourage you to develop a morning routine. Don’t feel bad if you have difficulty sticking to your routine, the important thing is to have one in place and to work towards the good habits daily.

It can be super easy to get distracted but don’t let that stop you from getting these morning rituals done.

To be honest sometimes I have difficulty sticking to this routine because my children are my huge distraction but if I can cross off at least 3 of these things every morning I typically feel pretty good!

Now if you feel your morning is consistent, what is it that you do every morning and do you feel like it’s helping with your personal growth in some way?

And who doesn’t want to start their day with a positive attitude and in a positive mood every day!

It took me some time to develop a morning routine. But I’ve found when I’m consistent in all 5 of these habits my mornings are better then ever! A great kick start to the day and feeling motivated to get stuff done.

Here is what I do just about every morning!

Start Off Everyday With These 5 Simple Morning Habits

1. Stretch

One of the first things to do is the morning is stretch. (It’s usually after I’ve had my coffee) You don’t need to perform any crazy yoga stretches first thing in the morning just stand up and move your body.

Reach for the sky, reach for your toes, move your head side to side, you get the idea. Get the blood circulating and get your energy levels back up. While stretching to a few deep breathes. This is the perfect way to wake the body and get it ready for the day!

2. Wash Your Face/Take A Shower

I feel like a good, cold, splash to the face is rejuvenating and refreshing. I feel like my puffy eyes instantly go down and I become more awake in an instant.

A cold shower is another quick way to get those energy levels up and a great way to kick start any day! I usually shower at night but if I need an extra pep in my step I put on this watermelon shower cap and take a cold body shower. I’m more alert then ever, and I just feel good.

3. Drink A Glass Of Water

One of the first things I do every morning and put into my body every morning is I drink a glass of lukewarm water. Not cold, water needs to be warm or I would say room temperature. I have been doing this forever now. The best reason to do this is to cleanse your digestive track and to help eliminate toxins from your body.

4. Read A Devotional/Watch Or Listen To Something Motivating

This is one of the best things to do every morning to get your mind right. Reading a devotional, listening to an uplifting podcast, or watching a motivational video is a great way to gain some perspective and to motivate you. There’s nothing like feeling inspired every morning. I can’t even begin to describe the impact of doing this every morning!

5. Make A To-Do List

Making a to-do list is a great way to hold yourself a accountable on tasks you want to accomplish. Creating a to do list every morning increases productivity and did you know it even relieves stress!

With life being so chaotic at times this is a great way to have some control and to remain organized.

Share your morning routine! What is it that you do every morning that gets you going?

Time to implement these habits into your life!

20 Habits To Teach My Daughters

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As a mother and a parent you can only hope and pray that when the day comes for your kids to venture on their own and do their own thing that they will be more then okay.

More then anything you want them to always be happy, to chase their dreams and to overall be a good person.

As much as you always want them to need you, you also want them to be independent and to be able to solve their own problems and to provide solutions to others.

In order for them to be independent and successful it’s important to develop good habits at an early age. Of course that’s my own personal opinion.

Being a mother to 3 girls, it’s very important to me for them to develop good habits in more then one category.

I want them to live an amazing life, with more joy then regrets and fears. I hope they feel accomplished while staying humble. And I pray that my 3 daughters will always stay close with one another through their lives. (I have faith they will hold each other accountable when they don’t feel like confiding in my husband or myself)

Teaching my daughters good habits while they are young I feel will only benefit them.

To me it’s much easier to develop a good habit then to break a bad habit.

With that being said here’s a list of habits I will teach my daughters in hopes that they will continue these habits as they grow older with age.

I do believe in these good habits and I know they can provide fulfillment in their lives.

20 Habits To Teach My Daughters

1. To Always Make Your Bed

Making your bed is such an easy way to start your day in a positive way. It encourages you to keep the rest of your room clean and tidy and did you know that making your bed every morning lowers stress levels. Also a nice made bed just makes you feel good and is nice to get into when it’s time for bed, am I right ?

2. To Have A Vision

Having a vision on what you want in your life and what you want to accomplish leads to motivation and productivity. Having a vision helps you to stay focus on your dreams and goals. It’s about knowing where you are going and what you want to do along the way.

3. To Stay Active

There are numerous benefits to staying active in your life. Higher self esteem, more confidence, lower stress, more energy, and that’s just a few of them! I want my daughters to choose activities, to explore, and to challenge their amazing bodies. We are more capable then we think.

4. To Be Mindful Of Their Diet

Im not saying I don’t ever want my girls to eat junk food, that’s just not living. I want them to be mindful though. To eat foods that will provide for them and not just be full of empty calories. Your health is so important and no, you can’t control everything. However you can control what you are putting into your body.

5. To Pay Themselves First

I don’t want My Daughters ever living paycheck to paycheck. I’ve been there and I’ve seen it with working in banking. I don’t want my daughters constantly being or feeling stressed by money. Paying yourself first means to put money into a savings every time you get money . Debt is a heavy burden. I want my daughters to be smart with handling money.

6. To Read

Reading is so power and I truly believe that. There is so much to be said and to learn through books. Words can influence and inspire. To have a habit of reading is having a habit of eagerness to constantly learn and grow.

7. To Be A Giver

I want my daughters to always know, that they will always have enough to give. I want them to give freely. I know how good giving feels and it’s also something we are instructed to do. The more we give, the more that will be given to us. To help another person or persons is being a light in their life. And I will always encourage my daughters to shine bright.

8. To Be Optimistic

Life is life. It’s not always fair and many things will happen in life that we just won’t understand. However, we choose our attitudes and our behaviors. Remaining optimistic and trusting in all situations will provide more peace in our lives. Who doesn’t want more peace and rest and in their life. I know if my daughters can remain optimistic through even the tough times that they will live a happier life and uplift others along the way.

9. To ALWAYS be Grateful

You’ve heard it before, omebody always has it worse. When you think your situation is a horrible one you will only be shown how grateful you really should be. I want my daughters to give thanks in all things, even the bad things. Everything that happens is shaping and guiding us in some way. Our trials are what strengthen us. No matter what, I want them to always be grateful.

10. To Clean Up After Themselves

People don’t like messy people. Sorry not sorry. It’s polite, it’s good manners, and cleanliness is just overall a great habit to have. I don’t think I need to say anymore.

11. To Always Take Time To Learn Someone’s Story

Everyone has a story. Not all are comfortable sharing theirs but some need to share theirs. Listen to them, learn from them. It is a privilege when someone decides to share something very personal with you. I want my daughters to take the time to listen to what someone can offer them through their own experiences. And to always thank them after they share something. It can take some courage sharing a story, we all know that much.

12. To Treat Yourself, Often

Often times we do so much for others that we forget to take care of ourselves. Treating ourselves lifts our spirit, boosts our mood, and is overall refreshing. It’s important to take care of yourself. Your happiness matters. As my daughters grow up and their lives become busy I will constantly be asking, “What have you done for yourself?”

13. To Sleep When Tired

Sleep is rejuvenating and we need sleep to properly function. It’s so important to listen to your body when it is tired and needs rest. Don’t just drink another coffee or energy drink. If the body is tired then rest. I also believe sleep has healing powers. I wish for my daughters to develop good sleeping habits.

14. To Be Courteous Of Others

I want my daughters to be courteous and respectful of others. Everyone has a story and everyone is going through something or has gone through something. There is no room to judge others or to ever think you are superior of another person.

15. To Pray/Meditate Daily

Prayer. Enough said. ( Joshua 1:9) I know with prayer my daughters will never feel alone.

16. To Live More Minimal Vs. Material

Less is more. The greatest things in life are not material things. Those types of things can only provide a temporary happiness. Then we become bored, and want something else. Training ourselves to live minimally and developing a habit of separating needs and wants will take you much farther and provide more clarity and freedom. I don’t want my daughters feeling they have to have specific items to feel joy.

17. To Practice Affirmations Often

Affirmations provide a type of awareness and self identity. We are capable of so much however many times we convince ourselves that we are not deserving or worthy. With practicing positive affirmations often we are reminding ourselves of our potential and what we are capable of. With encouraging my daughters to do affirmations I know they will begin to recognize how strong, courageous, and beautiful they truly are.

18. To Laugh At Yourself

We aren’t perfect, we are human. We are going to make mistakes in our life. Instead of dwelling over something that is out of our control or becoming fixated on something in the past we need to develop a habit of laughing at ourselves and brushing it off. We can’t change what’s been done but we can control our reactions. I want my daughters to learn to laugh at themselves vs beating themselves up.

19. To Serve Others

We all need one another. Giving your time is the best gift you can give. There are so many opportunities to serve others and in doing so I know others will help them when they are in need.

20. To Always Pause, And Enjoy The Moment

You know that country song that goes, “I’m in a hurry to get things done oh I rush and rush until life’s no fun, all I really gotta do is live and die, but I’m in a hurry and I don’t know why.”

We are always in a rush. Our mind is always on the next thing. We become so distracted that we don’t stop and enjoy where we are. Life is too short and too fragile to not just embrace moments. I want my daughters to stop and enjoy the sunset, to lay outside and look at the stars, to put their phones down. I want them to stop and to smell the flowers.

“Here’s To Strong Women. May We Know Them. May We Be Them. May We Raise Them.”

 

What kind of habits are you teaching your daughters?

Confront Your Fears And Struggles With These 8 Affirmations – Scripture References Included

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Everyone is going through something. No matter how they appear on the outside is irrelevant to what they may be experiencing on the inside.

Life has its hard moments. Moments where you feel like you are suffocating, you feel restrained, you feel unworthy, you feel defeated, you are fearful to the unknown.

When these obstacles visit, they typically visit unannounced and typically strike very hard. No preparation, they just completely catch you off guard. Leaving you bruised and winded.

I know it’s challenging when these moments happen or when you can’t seem to break free of these demons that are haunting you. Not everyone will know what you are going through. However I want to share that everyone knows the feeling of struggle in some form or another.

I want you to know that trials and tribulations are apart of life and they help us to strengthen our faith. When you think you are alone, I want you to know that you are not alone. I also don’t want you to give up. Never give up. Progression never ends and you will always have to work to get to the other side. Hard moments, fearful moments, challenging moments…they do not last forever.

In James 1:2-4 it is mentioned that we should be joyful during the trials in our life. These times are a true test of our faith in our Heavenly Father.

The Holy Bible – James 1:2-4

2. My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials,

3. knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience.

4. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. 

An Affirmation is a statement; you are declaring something. With saying these affirmations you are gaining power and not allowing your thoughts or attitude to go negative. This control of your mind is crucial in maturing and moving forward. When you find yourself thinking or behaving in a negative manner stop what you are doing and say a few affirmations to yourself. Just keep saying it, and don’t stop.

The more you say these affirmations the more they will resonate with you, the stronger your faith will become, and soon enough your armor will be indestructible. You will be able to handle anything that life throws at you.

Because remember, you are never alone in your turmoil.

With saying these affirmations I know it will provide the courage to take on whatever trial or trouble you are currently facing in your life.

God Bless You. 

Confront Your Fears And Struggles With These 8 Affirmations – Scripture References Included

(I encourage you to look up these scripture references and to highlight them. There may come a time when you are reading and this highlighted scripture will jump at you when you need it the most)

  • I trust in and love God completely, he is the only one I truly need and will direct me where to go Proverbs 3:5-6
  • God is my strength and is with me always Philippians 4:13 Psalm 23:4
  • I do not fear, I know God will not leave me Deuteronomy 31:6 Genesis 21:22
  • When I am afraid I will trust in God Psalm 25:2-5
  • I am living on purpose and will do great things Jeremiah 32:19 Ephesians 2:10
  • I am a confident person that does not worry Matthew 6:25-34
  • Through my trials my faith with only strengthen and mature James 1:2-4
  • I will choose to do things that I am afraid of 2 Timothy 1:7 
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God loves you and he wants you live a joyful life. He knows what he is doing. I know it can be difficult but trusting the Lord will provide peace in your life.

I pray these affirmations will provide peace for you. They have helped me tremendously and I know they can help you as well.

Please share any thoughts or comments, or feel free to contact me.

Thank you!

In A Nutshell, This Is What You Can Expect In Your 20’s

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20’s are an absolute blast I will say and a time for some full on growth.

Full of foolish moments that make you smile whenever you think about them. Happy hours, parties, late night shenanigans, plenty of all nighters, summer love, blurry moments, adventure, dancing, and some really fun, stupid times.

A few moments of “what was I thinking?” and, “I still can’t believe I did that” will happen when reminiscing about your 20’s.

Your twenties are kind of the carefree time in your life. At least in the beginning it starts like that.

When I say carefree I mean go with the flow kind of mentality. That things will just work out how they need so. Your thought process is that you have time.

Later you realize that’s not exactly how it works, if you want something it’s going to take work and you have to be willing to put in the work to get what you want. You also realize time doesn’t wait and you don’t get time back.

You don’t really realize how young and naive you are at that age till you are reflecting on the past.

You will be a different person at age 21, 25, and 29 no doubt. A little hard to believe how much changing and evolving happens during this time.

Your 20’s are full of growing and identifying who you are and what you truly want to be. You may move to a different city, make a drastic career change, get into a committed relationship, do things you said you’d never do, and a few setbacks may happen here and there.

Your 20’s are also full of mistakes. Recalling events or actions and feeling completely embarrassed or guilty. Or not taking that leap of faith your initiation was telling you to do.

During these moments you learn to discover the silver lining in all things.

Towards the end of your 20’s you begin to love yourself and you learn how to not let the opinions of others alter who you are. You may become lost, but you also find yourself in a completely different way.

You drift away from friends but gain new ones. Some you cut off completely, some you rekindle with.

You become very close with your family and recognize how often they have been there for you and have supported you.

You may get married and have kids. If it’s not happening to you it will be happening to the people around you. Don’t feel rushed or saddened.

There is a time for everything. One lesson you will learn in your 20’s.

There will also be a few hard moments that will probably happen in your 20’s. Heartbreak and loss. Feelings of wasted time and regret.

Struggles will happen with your relationship, you may experience struggles of trying to start a family, you may struggle with work, you may struggle with debt, you may experience betrayal, you may experience heartbreak, etc.

These are the moments that will shape you the most. You will become more empathic towards others and gain a variety of different perspectives.

A few things you will take with you onto the next decade are:

  • More confidence and more self assurance
  • A list of goals you are determined to accomplish
  • Awareness of how fast life really does go
  • Words of wisdom from friends, parents, or mentors
  • The courage to say No to things you really don’t want to do
  • That things will pass, and life does go on
  • More knowledge about your physical and mental health and how you need to stay on that
  • Friendships you’re incredibly thankful for

Advice for your 20s

  • Embrace everything
  • Seize opportunities that approach you
  • Explore and Travel
  • Learn how to manage your finances
  • Exercise
  • Spend time with your parents
  • Read more
  • Go On A Solo Trip If You Can
  • Don’t compare your journey to someone else’s
  • Pray
  • If you aren’t happy, don’t wait, do something about it NOW

On to the next adventure. On to the 30’s.

For myself, I am incredibly grateful for where I am and the lessons I have learned.

Wishing you the best, always.

Be grateful. Be thankful. Be humble.

If You Have Been Experiencing Mom Guilt, I Want You To Try This

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Being a Mom can be challenging. That’s the truth, and for many different reasons and unique situations.

While Motherhood is absolutely amazing and very humbling, it’s full of struggles, hardship and what many other Mothers would call ‘Mom guilt’.

You really won’t hear too many Mothers going around talking about the struggles they have with parenting, a lot of times we keep our hard times to ourselves.

Why? Because we are ashamed to even have these feelings and emotions. We feel embarrassed and unworthy at times. It’s difficult when these types of moods occur.

I got to a point in this Motherhood journey where I knew I needed to change myself. Some of my actions were definitely uncalled for. How could I expect my little one to control their temper when I could barely control my own.

I found myself constantly complaining and it felt like I was pouring out nothing but negative things. I was loosing my patience on my toddlers. I was crying because of my behavior. I was disappointed in myself. I couldn’t believe some of the things I did and said. I truly felt unrecognizable.

My faith has always been important to me. Even more important and guiding once I became a Mother. I knew at this point where I was that I needed to be put in my place. I needed perspective and I needed an adjustment in my attitude.

When I decided that I needed to do something, a devotional book came to mind. In the past I would watch motivating videos on YouTube in hopes of being inspired or driven in some way. This time, I wanted something tangible and something that I could reference back to when needed.

I also knew a devotional book would strengthen my relationship with God, which is what I really needed. I needed help with Mothering my children because I was tired and burnt out to say the least.

I went onto amazon and I believe I typed in, ‘women’s devotional book’. Trusting God Day By Day: 365 Daily Devotionals by Joyce Meyer was one of the books that showed up in my search.

I choose that specific devotional book because of the numerous great reviews.

Mothers, I want you to try reading a devotional everyday, preferably from a devotional book. I personally suggest a book because more is said then just the devotional itself. Insight is shared, perspective is gained, and the author finds a way to connect you with their words, that you can apply to your every day life.

Try reading a devotional first thing in the morning, if not first thing in the morning then sometime during the day. 

(note: When you are reading your devotional have your bible, a journal, and a pen handy. Write down whatever stands out to you, or write down more specifically, what it means to you.)

I would like to share that reading a devotional everyday has truly helped me with my Mothering. I am more patient then I was, I am more empathetic, and I have gained more self control.

A few slips are going to happen. You’re human. However you will get closer and closer to where you want to be. You got this Mama! I am praying for you!

This is the devotional book I am currently reading daily and I am so grateful!

I’m so incredibly thankful for this journey and my beautiful daughters who have brought new colors into my world. Thank you so much for reading. I hope this will bring more peace to you and your family if you choose to try this.

@coffeewafflesandmotherhood

Sometimes Your Child Just Needs To Hear You Say, “I’m Sorry.”

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Parenting is hard. 

As you have probably heard before parenting does not come with a manual guide, nor will it ever come with a guide because every single parent does parenting differently. There would be no way to accommodate to the variety of parenting styles if a guide even did exist.

I have 2 almost three year old’s and expecting another baby in a few months and I still do not have it figured out. Truth be told, I don’t believe I ever will. However, that does not bother me because I can appreciate that parenting is a journey full of never ending lessons. Some harder then others. I hear teenage years are the hardest. 

Before I became a parent I will admit I imagined it being nothing but easy and well, fun. Full of cute and happy moments. I never once thought about the struggles that come along with welcoming a child into your life.

I just thought about how I would be the ‘best mommy ever’. I am definitely not the best mommy ever FYI

I could not wait to be a mother. It was definitely a dream of mine and a calling I felt an eagerness to fulfill at a very young age. I had my first baby at 26, and I finally felt like this prayer of mine was answered.

When I became a parent, it was better then I ever imagined it to be. It was also way harder then I ever thought. I’m talking way harder. I think the way harder really set in when my husband and I received a second baby by surprise. We were completely caught off guard.

(we received our second baby when our first was 10 months old, to read about that story you can search ‘A Blessing In Disguise’)

Noticing A Blessing In Disguise

When you become a parent, you see things differently. You don’t just see things differently but you have a completely different awareness and understanding.

You look at your parents differently…….in good and bad lighting. Your friends who have had kids for a couple of years now? You feel sorry, because you just didn’t know what they were going through. You can even connect now with strangers almost everywhere you go that are holding a little hand.

You empathize with parents because you know it’s the most amazing and yet hardest privilege.

As a parent you want to do your best for your child. But it’s hard. There are many days where you feel like a complete failure. You also blame yourself for a lot of things that are really out of your control.

We never want to hurt them.

But truth be told, we are going to leave emotional scars on our children.

Now, that’s a real tough pill to swallow especially because we are continuously trying to be the best that we can be.

We do our best to give what we didn’t receive. To be, what are parents were not. To do, what are parent’s didn’t do. As well as, try not to do, what are parents did.

We do our best. But what we think is best, is not always the best and can impact our child in ways we can’t even imagine. Which is a little frightening when you really sit and think about it.

It’s a lot of pressure! We are shaping a life or lives! And one can only hope and pray that the wounds we cause aren’t too severe.

I don’t know what type of scar I am going to leave but I know I will leave one. It may be something I say, something I do, something I choose, something I don’t do…..who knows. But there will be a time, when my child will feel let down by me.

My child is never going to forget it. And neither will yours.

And you may never know what emotional scar you left unless your child has the courage to tell you.

Just about everyone suffers from some type of ‘childhood trauma’. From mild trauma to severe.

You had a parent that always put you down, you had a parent that you felt betrayed you in some way, you had a parent that hit you, you had a parent that suffered from substance abuse, you had a parent that was never honest, you had a parent that was never there, you had a parent that favored your other siblings, you had a parent that didn’t choose you, you had a parent that didn’t believe you, your parent had a temper, your parent embarrassed you, etc……

We all have something that is THERE.

Something that left us confused, upset, concerned, worried, scared, alone, numb…something.

I can tell you, causing you pain was never their intention. Maybe there were other things going on in their life, maybe they were afraid, maybe they thought they were doing a good thing for you…..you know, you just don’t know what was going on in their head at the time. OR…..you don’t really know the results of their ‘childhood trauma’ and how it impacted and shaped their behaviors. Who knows….

(note: If your child is grown, you’re right, you can’t change the past. But you can tell them sorry. That will provide more relief then you know.)

When I look at my daughters I can only pray the scars I leave aren’t too severe. And I hope they will be comfortable enough to tell me when I have hurt their feelings or possibly done something they wish I hadn’t.

I think to myself…..what am I going to do, one day, where I am going to let you down. Even Nemo in the Kids movie ‘Finding Nemo’ said I hate you to his dad, do you remember?

My heart breaks knowing that I won’t be a perfect mom where they will grow up and say their childhood was perfect. It’s unrealistic. That’s not going to happen. I will make mistakes. I know I will, because I already do make mistakes, feel guilt, and have regrets.

It’s something inevitable, it’s going to happen.

Can you think of anything that your parent said to you or did that you have never forgot? Whether it’s big or small you remember exactly how it made you feel. 

I have 3 things I will say to my children often that I hope will always bind us together and strengthen our relationships as years come and go.

I hope by saying these things often my children will have peace of mind and not be severely impacted and haunted for years to come by my actions or words that I have no idea will influence my child in the future.

They are below.

  • I LOVE YOU

I want to make sure I am saying this as much as possible to each child of mine. I hope my child never questions how much love I have for them. It’s not enough to just say it, but telling them why I love them. Expressing to them the joy they bring into my life. Sharing lessons they have taught me. WE know we love our children, but sometimes they don’t hear it enough or feel it enough. They need to hear it and feel it.

  •  I AM PROUD OF YOU

I don’t want to just say those words after they accomplish something like a good grade on a test or a tournament won. I want to say these words just because. I don’t want my children to think they always have to impress me or accomplish something grand to hear these words. I will be proud of them everyday and I want them to know how proud I am to be their Mother.

  • I AM SORRY

This is a huge one. Being a parent, it’s hard to admit our faults. Especially, to our children. We don’t want to admit that we made a mistake or take ownership for something that we have done, because honestly…..sometimes we think we are in the right. WE think we are, but from a child’s perspective it’s completely different.

A child isn’t expecting an apology from their parent, but sometimes they need to hear it to move forward and let that burden go. I plan on saying sorry often. Sorry if I hurt their feelings, sorry if I couldn’t make their soccer game, sorry for saying NO, sorry for not being cool enough, just sorry. I will always be sorry any time I have upset them but I hope one day they will realize why I did the things I did, why I didn’t do the things they wanted and why I am who I am. I know there will be times that they need to hear this from me, and my hope is they can always forgive me

I know I will never be the best, but I will never give up trying to be the best that I can be.

Parenting is hard…..but it’s also the best gift in the world. A true gift from God and a blessing.

mother and daughter on grass
Photo by Daria Obymaha on Pexels.com

 

Thank you for reading! 🙂

 

 

Be Enlightened-Share Your Growth

Featured The Wild Gems2 Comments

“Strength and growth come only through continuous effort and struggle.”

-Napoleon Hill

I have always enjoyed writing. Not always anything specific, but just simply writing. It’s very therapeutic and relieving for me. I have tons of notebooks laying around with the most random things written in them as we speak. I get a good chuckle here and there when I rummage through and read them, and other times, lets just say I find myself blushing from embarrassment. What would my husband or kids think if they read this right now….lol oh gosh.

Something I really, really, REALLY, regret doing is throwing away my teen journals. I was so taken back, a lot of the things I wrote were very personal and not the fondest memories when I would re-read my entries. They brought back pain or humiliation that I didn’t want to re-experience every time I re-read them. So like a dummy, I threw them away.

However, now that I am older and more “mature” I would really love to go back and re read what I was feeling in those days and compare to where I am now in my life.

But unfortunately those journals are long gone. It truly breaks my heart, but the lesson I learned in that is don’t throw away your writings. No matter what pain or grief some of your writings may bring, don’t toss them.

Your writings are your own little time capsule and it’s a great way to reflect on how far you’ve come. You may even learn a thing or two from well, YOURSELF.

With all that being said, a couple of days ago I was exploring all the notes I had stored in my phone. When something comes to mind I like to write it down so I don’t forget. 

I stumbled across a list of  my own lines that are ‘life advice’ related that I feel like sharing. After reading my ‘life advice’ I was wondering what the hell I was reading at that moment of writing these lol. They surprised me a little.

I consider myself pretty silly, but sometimes I can get pretty deep.

These are a few of my own little life lessons that I have learned through my own experiences. Maybe you can relate or you can apply my words into your life somehow.

Wishing you happiness and many blessings

Some life advice by yours truly

You can’t unscramble an egg once it’s been scrambled. But you know what you can do…..throw it into a burrito with some potatoes and cheese. 

You are going to make mistakes in your life. Mistakes and failures are inevitable. But that’s part of living. I’m sure you can think of a thing or two you wish you could take back but you can’t go back and hit any type of rewind button. However, you can control your reaction to the matter and how you plan on handling it. Think before you act, and hear the words in your head before you speak are to name a few. Remember, you can’t unscramble an egg once it’s been scrambled. But again, just because it’s scrambled now doesn’t mean you cant make a bad situation a good situation.

Don’t let every decision be like picking a paint color.

First of all, have you ever picked paint colors? It’s a little bit of nightmare, especially when trying to agree on colors with your significant other.

Don’t allow little simple decisions in your life to cause you any type of stress or anxiety. Whatever you pick may not be what you wanted, but be open to surprises and open to embracing something new. And always be confident in whatever you choose. It may not be what you thought…it may be better.

If you were granted a new life you would soon realize it’s not at all what you really wanted.

You are exactly where you need to be. Everything that has happened in your life thus far has been apart of the shaping of where you are now and will continue to shape you through the rest of your life. You would be surprised how much would be taken away in your life right now if you were to have a different life. A different path taken in the past wouldn’t lead you to where you are now. Look for the things in your life right now to be grateful for. And if you’re wishing for a new life, you’re spending too much time comparing your life to someone else’s. Especially…..ESPECIALLY someone on social media. 

Plan on things not going according to plan.

Isn’t this how the cookie always crumbles? It’s usually in your favor or against your favor. It ends up going better then planned or maybe worse. Accept that that is just how it is and laugh at it. Continue to make plans in life and don’t ever stop but if something changes along the way welcome the surprise whether it be good or bad. Whatever happened or happens, has a reason…..whether you know the result of it or not.

Your heart will always lead you in the right direction. It’s up to you to listen to it. 

Our hearts are often ignored. We humans are very fragile, easily manipulated, and very persuasive. Whatever is going on in your life should always be reevaluated from time to time. Our lives get so busy it’s important to pause, take a step back, and recognize where you are. Are you where you want to be…what is it that you truly want in this life.

Allow yourself some alone time with no distractions and listen to what your heart is telling you. You may not be happy with what is saying. No one else knows what your heart is saying but YOU. You are also the only one that can obey it. Whether you listen or not, it has a voice for a reason.

But how does it make you feel?

This is a question to ask yourself often. This question can be asked with almost every little thing that you do. If whatever it is, is making you angry, sad, hurt, bored, frustrated, etc. anything negative basically…it’s time to figure it out. Those types of things in life that aren’t providing happiness and joy are only going to hold you back from reaching even more happiness and joy in your life. Doesn’t necessarily mean you need to “let it all go” but it’s time to look for a solution to change that feeling. It is possible to turn the most dull tasks into pleasant ones. Get creative and open your heart and mind to inspiration.

Scars are medals of obstacles conquered. 

We are often ashamed of our scars. Doing our best to hide them so no one knows the truth. For some, the cut has been so deep they have a difficult time even acknowledging it’s existence.

Be proud of your scars. Your scars tell a story that no one else can. A scar is also something no one else can take away from you. It is yours and you should be owning it. Don’t be afraid or feel a need to hide your scars. Inspire others with your story. You are strong and courageous. You are still here.

Cry with your wounds, for one day the sun shall shine bright again.

Hard things are going to happen in your life. Really hard things. Hard things that leave you gasping for air and leave you feeling alone and confused. When those things happen, cry with your wounds and broken heart. Let your tears fall and feel all those emotions that are ripping through your soul.

Through this horrific rainstorm remember the promise of the rainbow. The sun will shine bright again, it will. Even when it feels like it never ever will. The sun will shine bright again.

Always say thank you, ALWAYS.

First of all, it’s just good manners to say thank you. Second, nobody owes you anything. I know that sounds a little harsh, but no one owes you anything in this life. Everything is earned and worked for.

People do nice things because they want to, not because they have to. Saying thank you often will take you farther then someone who does not appreciate nice gestures.

You always have enough to give.

Whether it be your time, your energy, or even your last dollar…..you will always have enough to serve another person. You get what you give. Plus, it’s proven that giving to others provides more happiness in your life.

There is more then one right way to do something. Be confident in YOUR WAY.

We don’t live in a black and white world. We live in a world that is full and colorful. No one in the world is you, and no one can do things like YOU do. Rather then trying to follow the crowd, discover your own way and be confident in your own direction or method. Be willing to share that way with others. But encourage others your way isn’t the only way. Help others find THEIR way. The destination may be the same, but the path doesn’t have to be. Find the path that matches YOUR needs.

You don’t always get what you want, but you get what you need.

Things happen in life that are unpredictable.

These types of incidents are a blessing in disguise. You may realize it sooner or you may realize it ten years later. Maybe even later. Be grateful when you can recognize it.

We are always provided the tools we need to help us and guide us in this life. May not come in the prettiest wrapping but all things are gifts. Some things have to happen in order for other things to happen. Please remember, that God loves you. He can see the whole picture, we can’t. Trust him.

I would love to hear from! Share your growth!

Do you have any life advice to share or maybe something someone told you that you never forgot!

Please comment with any thoughts or concerns! Have a great day! Thank you for stopping by!

-Marie Elizabeth

 

 

 

 

Make The Time To Celebrate YOU More – YOU Deserve It

The Wild GemsLeave a comment

When your child is doing exceptional in school or decides to do their chores without being told you reward them and you rave about it.

When your stubborn, little toddler finally goes potty all by themselves, you praise them, sing hallelujah, and you have a happy dance party, right?

When your husband actually listens and does what you ask him to do for once he gets lucky (wink, wink) and, you REMEMBER this moment. #isthisreallife

When your best friend surprises you and pays the tab for the drinks you acknowledge them, and you pay the tab on the next go around.

When your coworker covers your shift so you can attend a family event, you recognize them with their favorite coffee or a thank you card. At least I hope you do.

Are we sensing a pattern here yet?

Whenever someone does good, we remember, acknowledge, and we give love. We celebrate!

However……..

There is someone in your life that has been neglected for quite some time. This person definitely deserves some praise and acknowledgement.

WITHOUT DOUBT, this person has earned their right to treat and celebrate themselves, damn it!

This person is hardworking, dedicated, and constantly putting others needs, happiness, and demands above their own.

If you haven’t figured it out, that person is you! YES, YOU! I am talking to you!

It’s time to celebrate YOU! It’s time to give a little back to yourself! It’s time to enjoy oneself as they say!

You put up with, and have put up with, a lot of shit. You know it, and I know it. Even your pets probably know it. They do don’t they…..

Your needs are just as important, your hard work needs to be acknowledged, and you need to be doing good for yourself because like I mentioned previously, you’ve earned it! And I’m reminding you!

TIME TO PAINT THE TOWN RED FRIEND!

Before we do so, let’s do a toast:

To celebrating the miracle that you are.

To giving thanks to all the things and people that have served you.

To recognizing that everything about you is precious and unique.

To acknowledging and accepting that there is no one else like you, and that this is a beautiful thing.

And to always enjoy all of life’s offerings.

Babe, it’s time to Celebrate You. CHEERS.

It’s time to stop putting your needs and wants to the side, and it’s time to stop acting like what you do everyday is not extraordinary.

Every day, is a miraculous day if you are still breathing.

Reward yourself, treat yourself, take care of yourself, love yourself.

Celebrating you from time to time is only going to benefit you and those around you. The better mood you’re in, the better you will be to everyone else. That’s kind of common sense, right? Yet, here most of us are, putting ourselves last and not acknowledging all the amazing things we have done so far in our lives!

You’re not being selish. Don’t think that. You are taking care of you, and you are realizing that you are important too.

HOW DO I START CELEBRATING MYSELF? (It’s been that long or I’ve never really done that)

  • First, stop being so hard on yourself and thinking you’re undeserving of a few favors now and then. You are here and living, that alone deserves some recognition and appreciation.
  • Second, don’t always expect others or wait for others to treat you or celebrate your accomplishments (big or small). It is not up to other people to make you happy. Recognize the hard work that YOU have done and reward and celebrate yourself.
  • Third, think back to your childhood and write down what you really enjoyed doing when you were young. Begin to incorporate those things back into your life. Guard your time to do what you enjoy. That is treating yourself.

THE OUTCOME?

You will be happier. And aren’t we all striving for this?

It will open new doors for you, a happier you will benefit all the relationships in your life, you will become more productive, and you’ll want to help others see the value in themselves.

You will be able to help others recognize that they are important and worthy of celebrating themselves.

You will reap the benefits of guarding your time to celebrate, you. In taking the time to celebrate you and recognizing your blessings, you will be blessing others.

Maybe you celebrate yourself all the time. If you do, that is fantastic! Continue doing it and don’t ever stop! If you are not in this position, you may know someone who needs to hear this. Let them know they are deserving and encourage them to do great things for themselves.

Some people just need a little word of encouragement to get them doing what they enjoy doing again. In some way, you should be celebrating YOU everyday.

Treat yourself, take care of yourself, celebrate yourself, love yourself. 

AND If you needed a sign to do something nice for yourself, let this be your sign!!

With all this being said, don’t be so hard on yourself. Have an amazing day and go give YOU some lovin’.

-xoxo

m.g. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When Your Kids Are Distracting You And Your Spouse From Spending Quality Time Together

The Wild GemsLeave a comment

Remember how much freedom you and your spouse had before you had kids? Sleeping in together, staying out late, going wherever and whenever you wanted, you can recall I’m sure. Now your schedules are almost entirely planned around your kids. And you notice how you’re always busy now? It’s crazy right.

Having kids completely changes your lifestyle and it changes your relationship with your significant other.

You will face many challenges together with raising children. In this post I am only going to discuss one challenge and share with you what has worked for my husband and myself.

The Challenge:

Distracting you and your spouse from spending quality time together.

When you have kids, it can be a little challenging to maintain that one on one time with your spouse. With dates and intimacy.

It’s so important to keep your relationship thriving even when you have children. Let this be an opportunity to get creative and step outside your box.

My husband and I love our daughters so much. They are our world. However we do have moments where we reminisce about how spontaneous we were in the past and how completely oblivious we were to our freedom.

It’s amazing how you don’t really recognize how much freedom you have until a child enters your life.

Something we both have learned with having kids is time together has to be planned and scheduled.

Of course that’s not how it is all the time, but I would say a majority of time if we want to be alone it has to be planned in advance.

Just because you and your spouse have kids now doesn’t mean the love needs to be let go. Your relationship still needs to be a priority. And yes, it will take more work then what it did in the past.

I’m sure some of you are thinking, well I don’t have a baby sitter, or our schedules are so different, or possibly, I try but he isn’t willing, etc,

As I mentioned previously, this is an opportunity to get creative.

If you can’t get a babysitter or don’t feel comfortable leaving your children yet don’t sweat it. That was exactly how my husband and I were. We would have “at home dates” and still do! I would have our girls skip nap time so they would go to sleep early so we could spend time together, just me and him.

(As I said, we still do this. Some of the evenings of just eating ice cream together or watching something on TV take me and him back to the old days.)

When your schedules are different you need to take advantage of every moment together.

For example: You two only have mornings together. Maybe share coffee together and do a question of the day about one another. Remember, step outside the box.

(Note: Stay off your phones when you two are together. How many times have you witnessed a couple out together and they are both on their phones. Talk, listen, hold hands, BE PRESENT.)

Both of you need to be willing to try new things. If one of you is trying and one of you isn’t, there may be a deeper issue that needs to be resolved.

In that case, I might suggest help from a professional.

Discuss Your Relationship.

You two need to be on the same page and open to embracing this new chapter in your relationship. You won’t have to be so creative forever or plan every moment together forever. Your children are going to grow up.

But are you both happy right now? Have you sensed that you two are drifting apart or something just feels different. More then likely both of you aren’t getting enough attention from one another.

If these emotions have occurred this is your relationship craving some immediate attention. If you’re reading this there’s good possibility you’re in this situation.

In a nutshell I am saying, TAKE ACTION. Don’t allow your children to be the excuse anymore. 

Here Are A Few Moments To Always Take Advantage Of:

  • Bed time
  • Nap time
  • When they are on a play date or at a friends or with family
  • When they are glued to a game or YouTube
  • A Family Gathering
  • A birthday party
  • When they fall asleep in the car
  • In the morning before they wake up
  • When they head to school

…you get the idea.

These are all opportunities where you two can discuss something, plan something, do something, etc. Both kids fell asleep in the car? Go get something in the drive-thru, pull over, and enjoy it together. Kids are sleeping? uh, HELLO! Have some private time. At a gathering of some sort? There’s enough adults watching the kids, get playful. You can still be spontaneous, it will just be in a different way.

Also, it’s definitely more then OK to put other things on pause to give your spouse the attention they deserve and need.

Keep the sizzle and have fun. You’ll be laughing about these moments in the future and sharing them with your children.

A book I would highly recommend to strengthen your relationship with your spouse is titled The 5 Languages Of Love by Gary Chapman.

I definitely recommend this book even if your relationship is thriving right now! It’s an amazing eye opener and will bring you two even closer.

What works for you and your spouse, I’d love to hear it!