When your child is just learning how to stand or learning how to walk you are either holding them, or standing very close by.
In case your child falls you want to be there to catch them, versus them falling down and hurting themselves.
Nobody wants to see their child hurt or in pain, so we stand very close.
In this walk of life, we are the child and God is our heavenly parent.
But like most children we are very stubborn. We believe we can do things on our own, better yet, WE WANT to do things on our own. Like we need to prove something.
The thing with this mentality is we end up falling many times in life and learn many things the hard way, and it hurts. It hurts really bad. And God is just there waiting, patiently, to help us when we are ready to ask for it.
It’s not that he hasn’t tried to help us, we have pushed Him away saying, “I can do it myself, I don’t need you.” So he watches us fall and thinks to himself, please let me help you.
He knows learning how to walk is challenging and He knows the walk of life can’t be done without the help of Him.
Actually, it’s not that it can’t be done, it can. God just doesn’t want it to be a hard walk of life. He gives us an opportunity to try on our own but he stands by waiting for the permission to help us.
He wants to catch us on those falls because he knows if we keep falling we will be become discouraged and won’t try anymore.
Nobody wants to crawl forever. We want to walk and RUN. When we allow God to catch us we will begin to take more risks, we will be confident, and we won’t be afraid.
When my children were small they would crawl to the edge of the bed only because they knew I would catch them. Imagine if they could talk at that age and say things like, “alright mom, stop, I want to crawl all over the bed myself without you hovering me.” But my children let me be there for them just in case. They felt safe. And they actually enjoyed me catching me.
If you don’t want to let God catch you when you fall that is ultimately your choice, however if you surrender and just let Him help you….your life will change in the most incredible way because you will know that you can do anything.
You can crawl to the edge of the bed with no fear, always.
“As iron sharpens iron, So a man sharpens the countenanceof his friend.”
I had a really great, thought provoking conversation with a friend of mine that I have only known now for a few months. Our daughters are in class together and we met at one of their classmates birthday parties. Neither one of us knowing a beautiful friendship was about to be born. How grateful we must be for the small moments that lead to something priceless, like an amazing friendship.
We had a conversation on the phone not too long ago, and we had a deep conversation as we normally do. Unfortunately it came to an end due to my children needing my attention, but once we got off the phone I was provoked to find a scripture related to friendship because I felt so grateful to have a friend who I can share my inner thoughts with. We each challenge each other with what we believe in, in a very respectful way.
No offensive is taken, only respect and listening to each other sharing why we feel, believe, or think the way that we do. I believe we humble each other in our discussions and help one another to see more beyond the horizon. We sharpen each other.
How important, and what a gift, friendships are. A friend that is pushing, challenging you, and encouraging you, is going to improve you. Sharpen means improve or cause to improve. Improve means make or become better. Countenance means to admit what is acceptableor possible.
In relation to the scripture above, we strengthen each other’s tolerance and endurance to the sufferings that are experienced in this world. We alleviate burdens and give the gift of perseverance to one another.
To live is to experience suffering, we know this is true, and this scripture tells us how you and I can give strength to one another and endure what to some would be unbearable. This scripture reminds us that we are not alone in our sufferings and how important relationships are with one another.
We are here to uplift one another not to bring down. We must sharpen each other to the best of our capabilities. Because everyone at one time or another will seek or is seeking right now alleviation in what they do not know. We must share our light. We only shine because of those that taught us.
Reach out to your best friends today and remind them how much you cherish their friendship. Explain to them why you choose to have them in your life. Give them love and gratitude. How special to have such friends who develop us and push us to grow.
“Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content”
If we define the word worry, it reads; “give way to anxiety or unease; allow one’s mind to dwell on difficulty or troubles.” Think about that for just a moment. When we can’t control something, it causes us stress and anxiety. It leads us down the path of worrying where we end up in a field filled with fear.
How often do you worry? Many times I’m sure. About all sorts of things, right? We worry about the future, we worry about our children, we worry about bills being paid, we worry about our health, we worry about our family, we worry about many, many things.
We all worry. What you should know though is worrying is natural human survival instinct. Ultimately we worry to protect us from harm. Maybe you’re thinking, “how is worrying about my family protecting me? I’m worry about them.” Yes, that is true, however you worry to protect yourself from feeling pain. If something happens to someone in your family, you know you would suffer too. And who wants to suffer? Again, we worry to protect us. *Humans are pretty selfish, we think about ourselves a lot.*
Now worrying and living in fear is giving in to a very powerful force. Too many times we allow these emotions to completely control us and prevent us from truly living and feeling joy in our hearts. This also prevents our relationship with God from growing. Why? Because we aren’t trusting God. We aren’t trusting the creator of the entire universe. You’re not alone my friend, and you’re not on your own.
We have to lean in, we have to surrender, and we have to trust our Heavenly Father. He knows way more than we do. But, like a three year old, we are stubborn children. We want to do things on our own. Like children, we don’t want help. We don’t want to believe our Heavenly Father knows more than we do. Maybe we aren’t children, we kinda sound more like teenagers.
The spirit within us is like a muscle. As we strengthen our spirit muscle, it becomes stronger. The seed of love that God planted in all of us becomes stronger. God is love my friends. But we gotta water that seed! And we have to water others! As we continue to work on your relationship with God we become stronger than the flesh, we become stronger than those feelings and emotions that act like a wall preventing us from living in peace and harmony.
When we continue to seek God, the walls of fear and worry begin to crumble and dissolve like a soaked cookie in milk. We begin to feel peace within ourselves.
No matter what state we are in we aren’t worried or in fear because we know God loves us. We know no matter what, it’s going to be okay. We begin to understand God is in us, he surrounds us, he is reaching out and rescuing us.
But to be in that state, we have to reach our hand out. Gods hand is already present, we are the ones holding back. And once we grab ahold of the hand of God no matter what happens you’ll know in your heart God has got this. No matter what you know in the end Gods going to make everything right. God loves you. He loves you, He loves you, He loves you.
“For as the rain comes down, and the snow from heaven, And do not return there, But water the earth, And make it bring forth and bud, That it may give seed to the sower, And bread to the eater,
So shall My word be that goes forth, From My mouth; It shall not return to Me void, But it shall accomplish what I please, And it shall prosper in the thing for which I sent it.”
How wonderful is it when it rains after a long, stretched out drought. The animals and plants rejoice and dance together. Farmers thank the heavens. Rivers begin to flow effortlessly. The dust is pressed into the soft ground and what lingers is an incredbily crisp air that cleanses our lungs. The aroma of earth is fresh and ever so craving. When it rains for consecutive days, nature becomes fuller. Do you notice that? That is something you can see, that is something you can feel with your fingers. Life is sprung where you were oblivious to the seeds that were resting. How grateful we must be for the gift of rainfall.
As the scripture says “rain comes down, and does not return from where it came.” Rain comes down with a mission to accomplish and the rain never fails. It fully gives itself to earth. We may not see rain return to the sky but we can see the life of it’s work way after the rainfall has stopped. We look forward to the rain again because it is so pure and refreshing for all that it touches.
Gods word is like rain. It brings forth life, change, renewal, the same way rain does. Like the rain, Gods word has a mission and it will not fail those who ponder and read on it. We know the power of rain but yet, many of us have a difficult time believing in the power of Gods word. And that it can produce so much, just as rain and snow do.
He has left his word with us that it may water and bring forth seeds of love and compassion that reside in all of our hearts. He left His word to fulfill that empty space that we all are constantly trying to fill. Those are the seeds that are so thirsty. Watering those seeds with material and physical things will not clench the thirst of our spirits. They are watered with the things in which we cannot see. They are watered through pondering Gods word, prayer, hope, faith. His word is part of the equation to life. Humans, plants, animals, cannot live without water. We know this is true. To develop peace in our hearts is to study and ponder Gods word. As rain changes nature, Gods word will change our hearts. With His word, there is hope.
Notice what Gods word has accomplished in this world so far. Like the rain, it does not fail what it has been set out to do. Like the rain…
To my daughters; Demi, Ella, Wrenn. I love you girls so much. I scribbled these pieces in a notebook awhile back and I decided to share these and make it accessible to others who may need a little piece of advice.
May each of you continue to notice the lights in your life, always.
Pay attention to children. Study them and watch them with great intent. They will remind you how to live.
Always appreciate your surroundings. Compared to another, you may be living a dream.
Create friendships that will last a lifetime. Cherish that best friend you have, those kinds of friendships are like finding treasure.
It’s more than okay to cry in front of others, don’t ever be embarrassed.
Keep this in mind, “this to shall pass.” The bad things, and the good things. Embrace it. Enjoy it.
Cut the distractions and enjoy the moment.
Always respect yourself. You are so worth it, never doubt that.
You are not merely words, you are poetry.
Life will disappoint you sometimes, and you are never alone in that disappointment. What are you going to do about it?
Falling in love is worth it.
Think before you speak. Words stain like lipstick.
Don’t judge others. Just don’t. Everyone has a story and everyone has value.
Stick with the people who make you belly-ache laugh.
Love is a choice, choose love, always.
Scary moments will arise, but you can do it. Have faith in yourself, have faith in others.
Help whenever you notice the opportunity, but be cautious. Please don’t pick up hitchhikers.
Read. Read. Read. Gain knowledge and understanding. The world needs that.
Your body is perfect. Absolutely perfect and full of magic. Believe it.
Never lose sight of who you are, stay true to yourself.
Love God with all of your heart. Nobody loves you the way God does.
Get outside every chance you get and BREATHE. Close your eyes and just breathe.
Write whenever you can. Write your ideas, your dreams, things you have learned. Share it and pass it on.
Give gifts for no reason. One simple way to show another how much you value and treasure them. But the best gift is your time and attention.
Mama says use your manners but also eat with your hands and burp. It’s good for you.
Forgive yourself. Mistakes are going to happen. And when you begin reflecting, forgive yourself.
Dream big. Not everyone gets to the dream (or maybe they do) but you know what, most of the fun is the actual dreaming.
Have fun and get muddy.
Listen to others. You can hear and not be listening. Listen to what someone is saying.
Count your blessings, and count them often.
Tell the ones you love them, ALL THE TIME.
Learn about space. It’s a little terrifying, but absolutely miraculous.
Grudges are not good for the soul. Let it go baby, let it go. Practice forgiveness.
Cake for breakfast, why not? Sometimes you eat dessert first.
Be highly conscious what you are feeding your body and your soul. But make exceptions. Some day are for movies and pure comfort food.
No one is a mind reader. Steer from making assumptions and learn to talk it out.
Practice independence. It will benefit you.
You could be a billionaire or millionaire and still be unhappy. “The best things in life cannot be seen or touched but only felt with the heart.” Helen Keller.
Swallow your pride and say sorry when you need to.
You make an impact every single day. Even the days you don’t get out of bed.
Explore. Travel. NOTICE the world. There is so much beauty even in your front yard.
Cherish time, because you don’t get it back. But then again, you kind of do, just in a different way. A smell can make you time travel.
Be yourself, always. Because there is nobody who will ever be you. So embrace who you are, you beautiful creature!
Embrace your path. Comparing will only make you lose focus. You have your own purposes in this life.
Practice calmness verse becoming angry. Breathe in, breathe out. I know its hard, I know. But you are stronger than you believe.
Be a hostess, and host often. And it’s okay to go to bed and clean up the next day. Pay attention to who helps though and offers to clean up.
“I hope you dance.” by Faith Hill. Listen to that song and when you become a mom one day you’ll really understand it. I love you.
Don’t go looking for trouble, but get in a little trouble. It’s fun. Some trouble is worth it.
Let your voice be heard. You have so much to say and so much to share. You will inspire and change the world. You’ve completely changed mine.
Don’t surrender to peer pressure. If you are ever in a situation where you are feeling pressured, get out. That’s a red flag.
Fight back what you are passionate about. You’ve always had the fire. Don’t let anyone dim your light.
Don’t believe everything you hear. Ask questions or just smile. Take it with a grain of salt. And don’t things too personally. How a person treats you is a reflection on how they treat themselves. Show compassion.
Don’t ignore your intuition. But if you do, learn from it.
If you don’t want anyone to find out, there’s a good chance you shouldn’t be doing it.
Don’t be afraid to come across as foolish. Ask the questions, be the first, remain curious, try new things, and laugh at yourself.
Walk in light, be a light for others, and help others shine.
Be patient with yourself. A tree doesn’t grow that tall and give that much shade over night.
Go through your things often, and donate whatever you can. You can survive with less than you may believe.
Love life. Love it all. The bad and good. I mentioned this in number 14. Choose love over fear.
Never forget how much your parents really do love you. You are what gave them life.
Whatever you want in this life, I hope what I have to say can motivate or encourage you in some way.
Don’t ever stop being a dreamer.
“Set impossible goals”. I actually heard that quote on The Ellen DeGeneres Show. It was one of her greatest holiday giveaway ones.
A man had been swimming in the ocean, he did a flip, and broke his neck. Just like that, his life changed in an instant.
Life as we know is full of those kind of moments.
He was told that he may never walk again. A nurse told him something that gave him strength and determination. “Set impossible goals.”
Over time, he did learn how to walk again, he is one of the lucky few. He didn’t allow being told that he wouldn’t be able to walk again stop him or hold him back. He dreamed that impossible dream. The beautiful part of this story is he walked his wife down the aisle. And I’m willing to bet they danced too. All because he didn’t give up. All the frustration, the tears, the try after try were absolutely worth it.
(This isn’t them btw, I’m just providing a visual so you can truly try to empathize with this couple and to gain perspective. Hope it works.)
Everyone has something that they desire.What is your dream? I know you have one.
I’m willing to bet some of you reading this have never really been asked that question. Or you haven’t shared it with anyone.
I want this post to get you thinking about what you want in your life. To take a moment to identify what you seek.
When I was younger the only dream I truly desired so much was to become a mom. I’m not even kidding, that was my dream. It was a dream and it felt like a calling, I can’t really explain it. I wanted to be a mom so bad and my greatest fear was that I wouldn’t be able to have children.
When I became a mother my dream literally came true. Words cannot describe how much joy motherhood gives me. However, what’s crazy though, when I became a mom I also lost myself a bit.
Losing a bit of myself was very bizarre to me. I became something that I wanted so badly, yet, here was I not feeling completely fulfilled.
I went on a serious soul searching journey. And 3 kids later I feel the most confident, courageous, that I have ever been. And I have grown so much.
Motherhood has been the best thing to ever happen to me, because I found a different part of myself. New dreams are being born and new goals are being formed because of my first dream. My daughters inspire me. I have started dreaming ‘impossible dreams’ because of them.
I share this because I don’tever want you to feel discouraged. The feeling of reaching something but not quite feeling the way you thought you would will happen sometimes.
I saw an interview with Tom Hanks on The Today Show and he said something along the lines of, “The good things you feel from an accomplishment don’t last, and the same goes for the things that bring you down.”
I’m grateful for my dream of motherhood coming true. Greatest, hardest thing ever! This blog exist because of my girls! I have no idea where this blog will take me, but so far it’s probably helped me more then it’s helped any of you.
Trust the Timing of things. And trust your path. Each path provides some type of lesson to get you where you need to go next.
It can take time trying to figure out what you really want.
The point is, don’t give up. Keep trying, keep experiencing, keep doing! And stop being so concerned with what others think. Otherwise you’ll just become stuck and you will settle. If you only knew that just a few feet more you’d see that something greater was waiting for you.
If you’re afraid to fail in front of others, you’re going to have to suck it up. I say that in the nicest way possible.
I personally would rather keep trying new things and experiencing failure to find what really lights my spirit up, then to just settle because I’m in a content position.
You can’t be afraid of dead ends, u-turns, or any paths that lead you into a roundabout.
The pitfalls, the mistakes, the redos are going to happen and they have to happen in order for you to learn and grow and to get where you want to be.
4 THINGS TO CLOSE THIS UP
(Thanks if you read this whole thing!)
Don‘t forget the reasonwhy you’re doing what you are doing.
Write your goals down and work towards it everyday.
Stop limiting yourself, set yourself to be free and to express who you really are and who you want to become.
I think something we all think about from time to time is our purpose in life.
Not just our purpose, but we wonder how we are contributing to this world. We ask ourselves what impact am I making, or how can I make an impact? I have an answer.
We reciprocate kindness. It’s something so simple yet extremely powerful.
Can you imagine a world where people were just more kind. Kind as in soft hearted, thoughtful, helpful, loving, full of compassionate and sincerity.
You hear about acts of kindness, you hear how contagious it is but what is an act of kindness really.
An act of kindness is a selfless act you do for someone or something for the mere fact of making them feel good and expecting nothing in exchange. That’s a very simple explanation.
In result of these actions, these acts of kindness, you feel good. You feel really good, you feel positive, you feel and you know you are making an impact in someway. If you are unaware of this, YOU ARE MAKING A DIFFERENCE with every kind thing that you do.
You don’t need to know the results of whatever good acts of kindness you are doing because in your heart you know these good deeds are impactful and will go further then you can possibly imagine.
Kindness is extremely contagious. Which is why we need to be more kind to one another.
Even just witnessing an act of kindness makes you feel good! Have you ever noticed that?
In performing more acts of kindness you are spreading magic.
When someone does something nice for YOU, don’t you feel a need and a desire to reciprocate it. You want to return the gesture because you keep in mind how good it made you feel and you want to pay it forward.
All this kindness feels so good because it releases that love hormone you’ve heard about, oxytocin.
A hormone that is released through intimacy, hugging, childbirth, and that’s just to name a few! Overall I think we all can agree it’s a pretty good feeling.
I feel like often we are reminded how cruel this world can be. Whether it be something we watch on the news or see on social media, or hear maybe on the radio.
It’s crucial to not let these bad things that exist harden your heart and to stay strong with your ‘kindness armor’.
Being a Mother I worry a lot about my children and this world they are growing up in. But I know if we are all just more kind this world really can be a better place.
I challenge you to do more acts of kindness. Empathize with one another and choose to love. We are all in this together. We are one.
No matter how big or small you think you are, you play a huge part in this life and world and plan. Lift those who are weak, continue to strengthen yourself to help others, and never give up on the vision that you have for a better place.
Our mornings are what set the day for success, they set the pace for positive results, and they set our mood for optimism. Have you ever heard the quote, “Win the morning, win the day.” By Entrepreneur Tim Ferriss.
It makes a difference when things are running smoothly versus getting a late start and then constantly feeling rushed.
When we can win the morning we are setting ourselves up for productivity. You are more likely to feel a sense of accomplishment through out your day when you have a great morning
Think for a quick moment, what do your mornings look like? How are you shaping them daily.
Would you describe the start of your day as relatively consistent or a tad sporadic? I guess it kind of depends if you went out for margaritas the night prior or not. But on a daily basis what’s your routine look like?
If you don’t have a morning routine I highly encourage you to develop a morning routine. Don’t feel bad if you have difficulty sticking to your routine, the important thing is to have one in place and to work towards the good habits daily.
It can be super easy to get distracted but don’t let that stop you from getting these morning rituals done.
To be honest sometimes I have difficulty sticking to this routine because my children are my huge distraction but if I can cross off at least 3 of these things every morning I typically feel pretty good!
Now if you feel your morning is consistent, what is it that you do every morning and do you feel like it’s helping with your personal growth in some way?
And who doesn’t want to start their day with a positive attitude and in a positive mood every day!
It took me some time to develop a morning routine. But I’ve found when I’m consistent in all 5 of these habits my mornings are better then ever! A great kick start to the day and feeling motivated to get stuff done.
Here is what I do just about every morning!
Start Off Everyday With These 5 Simple Morning Habits
One of the first things to do is wake up and stretch. You don’t need to perform any crazy yoga stretches first thing in the morning just stand up and move your body.
Reach for the sky, reach for your toes, move your head side to side, you get the idea. Get the blood circulating and get your energy levels back up. While stretching to a few deep breathes. This is the perfect way to wake the body and get it ready for the day!
2. Wash Your Face/Take A Shower
I feel like a good, cold, splash to the face is rejuvenating and refreshing. I feel like my puffy eyes instantly go down and I become more awake in an instant.
A cold shower is another quick way to get those energy levels up and a great way to kick start any day! I usually shower at night but if I need an extra pep in my step I put on this watermelon shower cap and take a cold body shower. I’m more alert then ever, and I just feel good.
3. Drink A Glass Of Water
One of the first things I do every morning and put into my body every morning is I drink a glass of lukewarm water. Not cold, water needs to be warm or I would say room temperature. I have been doing this forever now. The best reason to do this is to cleanse your digestive track and to help eliminate toxins from your body.
4. Read A Devotional/Watch Or Listen To Something Motivating
This is one of the best things to do every morning to get your mind right. Reading a devotional, listening to an uplifting podcast, or watching a motivational video is a great way to gain some perspective and to motivate you. There’s nothing like feeling inspired every morning. I can’t even begin to describe the impact of doing this every morning!
5. Make A To-Do List
Making a to-do list is a great way to hold yourself a accountable on tasks you want to accomplish. Creating a to do list every morning increases productivity and did you know it even relieves stress! With life being so chaotic at times this is a great way to have some control and to remain organized.
Share your morning routine! What is it that you do every morning that gets you going?
As a mother and a parent you can only hope and pray that when the day comes for your kids to venture on their own and do their own thing that they will be more then okay.
More then anything you want them to always be happy, to chase their dreams and to overall be a good person.
As much as you always want them to need you, you also want them to be independent and to be able to solve their own problems and to provide solutions to others.
In order for them to be independent and successful it’s important to develop good habits at an early age. Of course that’s my own personal opinion.
Being a mother to 3 girls, it’s very important to me for them to develop good habits in more then one category.
I want them to live an amazing life, with more joy then regrets and fears. I hope they feel accomplished while staying humble. And I pray that my 3 daughters will always stay close with one another through their lives. (I have faith they will hold each other accountable when they don’t feel like confiding in my husband or myself)
Teaching my daughters good habits while they are young I feel will only benefit them.
To me it’s much easier to develop a good habit then to break a bad habit.
With that being said here’s a list of habits I will teach my daughters in hopes that they will continue these habits as they grow older with age.
I do believe in these good habits and I know they can provide fulfillment in their lives.
20 Habits To Teach My Daughters
1. To Always Make Your Bed
Making your bed is such an easy way to start your day in a positive way. It encourages you to keep the rest of your room clean and tidy and did you know that making your bed every morning lowers stress levels. Also a nice made bed just makes you feel good and is nice to get into when it’s time for bed, am I right ?
2. To Have A Vision
Having a vision on what you want in your life and what you want to accomplish leads to motivation and productivity. Having a vision helps you to stay focus on your dreams and goals. It’s about knowing where you are going and what you want to do along the way.
3. To Stay Active
There are numerous benefits to staying active in your life. Higher self esteem, more confidence, lower stress, more energy, and that’s just a few of them! I want my daughters to choose activities, to explore, and to challenge their amazing bodies. We are more capable then we think.
4. To Be Mindful Of Their Diet
Im not saying I don’t ever want my girls to eat junk food, that’s just not living. I want them to be mindful though. To eat foods that will provide for them and not just be full of empty calories. Your health is so important and no, you can’t control everything. However you can control what you are putting into your body.
5. To Pay Themselves First
I don’t want My Daughters ever living paycheck to paycheck. I’ve been there and I’ve seen it with working in banking. I don’t want my daughters constantly being or feeling stressed by money. Paying yourself first means to put money into a savings every time you get money . Debt is a heavy burden. I want my daughters to be smart with handling money.
6. To Read
Reading is so power and I truly believe that. There is so much to be said and to learn through books. Words can influence and inspire. To have a habit of reading is having a habit of eagerness to constantly learn and grow.
7. To Be A Giver
I want my daughters to always know, that they will always have enough to give. I want them to give freely. I know how good giving feels and it’s also something we are instructed to do. The more we give, the more that will be given to us. To help another person or persons is being a light in their life. And I will always encourage my daughters to shine bright.
8. To Be Optimistic
Life is life. It’s not always fair and many things will happen in life that we just won’t understand. However, we choose our attitudes and our behaviors. Remaining optimistic and trusting in all situations will provide more peace in our lives. Who doesn’t want more peace and rest and in their life. I know if my daughters can remain optimistic through even the tough times that they will live a happier life and uplift others along the way.
9. To ALWAYS be Grateful
You’ve heard it before, omebody always has it worse. When you think your situation is a horrible one you will only be shown how grateful you really should be. I want my daughters to give thanks in all things, even the bad things. Everything that happens is shaping and guiding us in some way. Our trials are what strengthen us. No matter what, I want them to always be grateful.
10. To Clean Up After Themselves
People don’t like messy people. Sorry not sorry. It’s polite, it’s good manners, and cleanliness is just overall a great habit to have. I don’t think I need to say anymore.
11. To Always Take Time To Learn Someone’s Story
Everyone has a story. Not all are comfortable sharing theirs but some need to share theirs. Listen to them, learn from them. It is a privilege when someone decides to share something very personal with you. I want my daughters to take the time to listen to what someone can offer them through their own experiences. And to always thank them after they share something. It can take some courage sharing a story, we all know that much.
12. To Treat Yourself, Often
Often times we do so much for others that we forget to take care of ourselves. Treating ourselves lifts our spirit, boosts our mood, and is overall refreshing. It’s important to take care of yourself. Your happiness matters. As my daughters grow up and their lives become busy I will constantly be asking, “What have you done for yourself?”
13. To Sleep When Tired
Sleep is rejuvenating and we need sleep to properly function. It’s so important to listen to your body when it is tired and needs rest. Don’t just drink another coffee or energy drink. If the body is tired then rest. I also believe sleep has healing powers. I wish for my daughters to develop good sleeping habits.
14. To Be Courteous Of Others
I want my daughters to be courteous and respectful of others. Everyone has a story and everyone is going through something or has gone through something. There is no room to judge others or to ever think you are superior of another person.
15. To Pray/Meditate Daily
Prayer. Enough said. ( Joshua 1:9) I know with prayer my daughters will never feel alone.
16. To Live More Minimal Vs. Material
Less is more. The greatest things in life are not material things. Those types of things can only provide a temporary happiness. Then we become bored, and want something else. Training ourselves to live minimally and developing a habit of separating needs and wants will take you much farther and provide more clarity and freedom. I don’t want my daughters feeling they have to have specific items to feel joy.
17. To Practice Affirmations Often
Affirmations provide a type of awareness and self identity. We are capable of so much however many times we convince ourselves that we are not deserving or worthy. With practicing positive affirmations often we are reminding ourselves of our potential and what we are capable of. With encouraging my daughters to do affirmations I know they will begin to recognize how strong, courageous, and beautiful they truly are.
18. To Laugh At Yourself
We aren’t perfect, we are human. We are going to make mistakes in our life. Instead of dwelling over something that is out of our control or becoming fixated on something in the past we need to develop a habit of laughing at ourselves and brushing it off. We can’t change what’s been done but we can control our reactions. I want my daughters to learn to laugh at themselves vs beating themselves up.
19. To Serve Others
We all need one another. Giving your time is the best gift you can give. There are so many opportunities to serve others and in doing so I know others will help them when they are in need.
20. To Always Pause, And Enjoy The Moment
You know that country song that goes, “I’m in a hurry to get things done oh I rush and rush until life’s no fun, all I really gotta do is live and die, but I’m in a hurry and I don’t know why.”
We are always in a rush. Our mind is always on the next thing. We become so distracted that we don’t stop and enjoy where we are. Life is too short and too fragile to not just embrace moments. I want my daughters to stop and enjoy the sunset, to lay outside and look at the stars, to put their phones down. I want them to stop and to smell the flowers.
“Here’s To Strong Women. May We Know Them. May We Be Them. May We Raise Them.”
What kind of habits are you teaching your daughters?
Whether you have been scheduled a c-section or you’re anticipating one, it can be a little overwhelming.
Especially if you’ve had already one and it wasn’t a good experience. Could have been an emergency one or something different. Whatever the case, it may have left you on edge a bit.
Thinking of labor and delivery may be the last thing you want to do because you’re probably scared to relive it or you’re afraid of the unknown of going through it.
Which btw is completely normal to experience these feelings and anxiety before a c-section.
I know the feeling of fear leading up to a c-section. I had an emergency one with my first. My second was scheduled. I was absolutely terrified. To the point of crying pretty much anytime anyone brought it up to me.
When I found out I was pregnant I already anticipated that I would be having another c-section. The fear I had of having to go through that again stole joy from my pregnancy. It was difficult for me to enjoy because I was so fixated on what I was going to have to go through again. I was stuck on THAT experience. Assuming it would be the exact same way. (note: emergency and scheduled really are completely different.)
I want you to know that I know how you’re feeling and I really hope this blog post can help you ease your mind and go into this procedure with a strong and courageous attitude!
Below is exactly what I did and I’m so happy I took the time to mentally prepare myself. I didn’t want my baby entering the world with a stressed mama and I wanted to embrace and be brave through this experience.
(If you have questions or concerns or just want to talk about how you’ve been feeling please don’t hesitate to contact me.)
A Guide To Mentally Preparing Yourself For A C-Section
(This was a repeat c-section for me. My first was an emergency and my second one was scheduled and what a completely different experience it was. I also healed way faster then with my first. I was still scared naturally ,however taking the time to mentally prepare myself helped me beyond measures. I truly hope what I did may help you in someway as well.)
Listen To Soothing Music
Music is proven to calm down anxiety. What I did was I bought “soothing music” on iTunes. (The type of music you would hear while getting a massage.) I would go to sleep with it on a night because that was often the time my fears would really set it. I listened to this type of music a week prior of my scheduled c-section. I know it helped calming my nerves.
Say Daily Affirmations
Affirmations are more powerful then you may believe. Saying affirmations truly helped me to overcome my fears and negative thoughts. Whenever I caught myself thinking the worst I would say or think to myself,
“I am strong and courageous. I am not afraid. I know God is with me.”
This is in reference to the scripture Joshua 1:9. I can’t even express how much power I would feel saying this often and how much peace it brought me.
Read Positive Uplifting C-Sections Stories (They do exist)
When people hear “c-section” they often associate it with a negative experience. People will often give you a cringe type of look when you tell them you have a scheduled C-section or that you’ve had a C-section.
I want you to know there are some great, uplifting, positive stories out there. You just have to search them. These stories can provide some type of relief that your experience can be just as wonderful and positive as theirs.
Express Your Concerns And Fears To Your Doctor
This is very important. My hope is that you trust and are very comfortable with your Doctor. Let her or him know how you have been feeling. They will do their absolute best to calm you and make this a very pleasant experience for you.
When I had my c-section I requested to have oxygen to keep me calm. I didn’t even end up using it because I was able to calm myself down mentally. I was so proud myself. My doctors and nurses were also extremely amazing and made me feel so safe and comfortable. I cannot thank them enough for going above and beyond for me.
Talk About It
When I was able to talk about my delivery without crying I knew I was making progress. The more you actually talk about the procedure and recovery the more comfortable and confident you will be going in.
Make A Mental Check List
I read a blog titled ‘What To Expect When Having A C-Section By An L&D Nurse’. Her blog literally walked me through exactly what I went through.
It helps knowing what to expect so you aren’t caught off guard by anything. So when we left in the morning I started checking off things in my head, I was somewhat a step ahead or already knew what the next step would be. I felt more in control of the situation.
(This is a glimpse of what I was checking off in my head. I made a checklist on my notes app.)
Try To Have Your Procedure Scheduled In The Morning
The sooner the better. Statistically less complications happen in surgeries scheduled in the morning. This will provide a little peace of mind for you if you can be scheduled in the morning.
Also the Doctors and Nurses are just starting their day. They are alert and hopefully well rested to care for you as their first patient.
Pray (Ask For Prayers)/Meditate
Pray, pray, pray. I am a believer in prayers and I know God hears them. This is where your faith and trust is truly strengthened.
And it is OKAY to ask for prayers. It’s more then okay.
When you feel your mind being directed back to your fears DISTRACT YOURSELF. Worrying truly isn’t going to do anything but steal joy from enjoying your days and nights.
What I did was play and entertain my other two daughters, read, and wrote blogs. It kept me busy and mind off other stuff.
Trust And Think About Meeting Your Baby
Put all your focus on meeting your little miracle. Express your gratitude and try your best to just enjoy the moment and all the little details. You will be so happy you did.
It will all be worth it Mama. Before you know you will be holding your sweet baby. You got this.
I know you can do this. I am praying for you and I wish you a happy and healthy delivery. As well as a super fast recovery.