Author: The Wild Gems

We are all like precious stones. We all come in different shapes and sizes. It is when we are cut and polished that we begin to live a more radiant life.
The Wild Gems hopes to inspire you to live life to the fullest and to enjoy every moment!

It’s A Different World For A Female – 5 differences along with a positive outlook

Featured The Wild GemsLeave a comment

Not too long ago I  had some type of weird pressure, heavy feeling, located on my C-section scar. So of course like most people I turned to google and found many other women who experienced the same sensation with their scar.

Some said they felt the pressure a couple of days before their menstrual cycle, some said it’s normal and never goes away, and a few said to get it checked out.

After reading a few responses I just sat there dumbfounded, and began to think about the hardships of being a women. Or, the inconveniences some may say.

I looked at my husband and said, “You know what, sometimes it’s hard being a woman.”

He kind of laughed at my random comment and said something a long lines of, “do you want to be a man then?”

When I said that to him I just started thinking about the difficulties of being female and then I thought about my daughters. I thought about what they will experience and what they will go through as they get older in life….I pray, I just pray.

I’m not complaining just so you know, I really enjoy being a woman. I believe there are many great upsides to being a female. Although, I can’t help but wonder if I was a guy for a year if I’d still enjoy being a female. I don’t know. But I do know that it’s different world for us.

And hey, men can argue it’s a different world for them too. Which in some ways it is I’m sure. I may do a google search on this later on a mans perspective. I’m a little intrigued now. 

ANYWAYS……….

I asked my nephews once if they would ever want to be female and they all responded with a strait up NO. I asked why and their response was “I don’t know”. One of them did say because I don’t want to give birth (hahah).

Lol yeah, I can understand the fear of that. However given birth I also know it’s an experience that can’t really be described.

But as I was saying it’s a completely different world for us if you ask me. To some it’s VERY DIFFERENT. Every woman has her own story.

Here are a just 5 reasons why I believe it’s different for us (Not saying there isn’t more but this what I came up with at the moment)

  1. We Are Constantly Judged And Compared

We are constantly judged on pretty much everything that we do, that most of the time we aren’t even ourselves. Pretty sad. We are competing with another person and in reality, they are competing with someone else. We are trying to be what others want or what we THINK they want.

We are judged on our appearance, what we wear, who are friends are, who are family is, what we say, what we do, etc. Believe it or not, this starts when we are children! Although we aren’t just judged by others, with all of this judging and comparing we begin to fall into this black hole that results in us comparing and judging ourselves. Where as we should always be loving ourselves. But unfortunately that’s not something that is really taught.

2. We Live In Some Type of Weird Comfortable Fear

We know we can’t walk the streets at night by ourselves, we know we can’t meet a new guy somewhere isolated, we prefer females doctors over males, we are careful not to expose too much, we hold our keys between our fingers or carry pepper spray when walking to our car at night, we know to be careful with our drinks at a party, and so on.

We know these things because we are aware of the possible outcomes if we don’t follow these ‘principles’. A little ridiculous to call these principles but we know if we follow these tips they will less likely lead us into harm.

We are seen as easy targets, vulnerable, weak…..and we have to be careful. Being female we know this is how it is and that we have to be completely cautious. Being alert just becomes a way of life.

3. We feel ALL THE FEELS aka We Welcome Our Emotions Differently

As a women I feel, we feel so deeply. We are so in tune with our emotions and expressing ourselves……that it’s exhausting. It almost feels like the rest of the world doesn’t understand. Except other women HA. We are incredibly sensitive creatures with so much to say. We are constantly thinking and just wanting to feel loved and appreciated. We are also incredibly empathetic which I feel takes a toll on us sometimes because we just feel the pain and suffering of others that it just resonates with us.

We are such emotional, and we are known for that. It just who we are. And sometimes, we just feel so much we don’t even know what to do with all these feelings.

4. BODY

Well, as I mentioned we are constantly judged on the way our bodies look. Boob size, butt size, flat tummy, blah blah blah……..a few things many women are insecure about.

I wonder why…

But its not just insecurity. Our bodies remind us once a month that we are women.

Cramps, PMS, tampons, pads, these cycles aren’t exactly convenient for us.

Remember I mentioned childbirth previously? It really is an amazing, indescribable experience. But pregnancy and birth do a number on your body.

The woman’s body is….something very unique and I feel it should be cherished more. No matter what it looks like or has gone through.

5. Half The Time, We Aren’t Taken Seriously

It’s when we use a certain tone or stance and THEN people stop what they are doing and listen or pay attention. But what’s so aggravating about that is we have to use that “certain tone” or whatever to get noticed or heard.

It’s ridiculous.

After a while we get sick of playing nice. We don’t want to do things the hard way or “mean way”, we don’t want to “unleash the beast’  but as a woman, its almost always this way if we want to make or see a change in something. It’s effing annoying.

So yes, this is why I feel it’s a different world for us, however let me share some positive sides to these differences. 

  1. Yes, we are always judged but when you learn to love yourself  as a women…..it is the most liberating and powerful thing. You become unstoppable and fearless.
  2. We do live in a world where we have to be cautious and careful but I also feel because of this we get to experience more acts of kindness which makes us even BETTER WOMEN. We get our doors opened for us, we get to go first, we receive help when needed, etc…….BECAUSE WE ARE WOMEN.
  3. We do feel so deeply, but I think most women will agree that feeling so deeply is such a privilege. Yeah, feeling hurt and heartache sucks. But feeling love and joy is so amazing. We give all of our heart to things that matter to us and love like no other. That is something very special about us.
  4. It’s pretty normal that we feel insecure about our bodies. But it’s when we finally learn to love this amazing tool that GOD gave us that we gain this type of confidence. And its a beautiful thing that nobody can ever take away.
  5. It is unfortunate to not be taken seriously when we “talk soft”, or to be taken seriously, THE FIRST TIME. However, we know when we need to roar the ground will shake. It scares people, and we love it. Sometimes we even scare ourselves with our own strength and that’s pretty amazing when that happens. We then become unstoppable.

 

A Message To The Females:

.

.

.

.

.

.

DARLING,

JUST

FUCKING

OWN

IT.

purple lipstick
Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

 

@rereelizabeth

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

9 Grocery Shopping Tips, For A Stress-Free Trip Every time

Featured The Wild Gems1 Comment

Every week or every other week most of us will find ourselves at the grocery store. We are either shopping for ourselves, our family, maybe a family gathering coming up, a pot luck, a birthday party….the list goes on.

We have to eat and let’s be real, grocery stores are incredibly convenient! How fortunate are we to have a store that supply’s our food, and does the hard work for us! Huge thank you to the farmers and businesses out there that make providing meals to my family easy and simple! We appreciate you!

But, to be completely honest, grocery shopping isn’t exactly my favorite task to do. I tend to overspend, buy unnecessary items, having crying or antsy toddlers with me, and it usually makes a miserable shopping trip. Which is why I would typically cringe when it was time to make my way to the store.

However I have since then “gained experience” and have figured out ways to have a pleasant trip every time whether I am by myself or with my kids. As well as save money and leave feeling satisfied after every check out.

Below I have 9 tips that will provide ease for your grocery shopping trips and make it stress-free every time. 

 

  1. MAKE A GROCERY LIST…stick to it and don’t forget it!

This kind of seems like a no brainer but many people don’t make a list before they shop. I use to be one, I’ll admit it. My very organized husband got me into the habit of making a list every time and for that I am so grateful!

Many eye their fridge and cabinets and assume they will remember everything they need. Unfortunately, it’s not until they are already home where they realize they forgot the most important stuff. ugh! Talk about the worst! If you are going with your kids a list is crucial! As kids are super distracting when trying to shop for necessary items.

When you make your list try to categorize your items with the different aisles or sections. That way you aren’t running around from one side of the store to another. We’ve all been there, and it’s very frustrating.

tip: Throughout the week keep a pen and paper handy in your kitchen. When you notice you are out of something or in need of something write it down so you don’t forget it on your list. Once this habit is installed you won’t ever forget your list and you will get into the habit of only buying what you need. 

2. Avoid Grocery Shopping On The Weekends

Why would I say avoid grocery shopping on the weekends…because it’s usually busy AF.

If you decide to shop on the weekends you should expect crowds, long lines and bagging your own groceries. Don’t even get me started with bagging my own groceries.

I personally enjoy grocery shopping when it’s less busy and I’m not having to squeeze past people.

tip: If you can only shop on the weekends I suggest going early morning or late evening. It’s so peaceful and there’s barely anyone. My personal favorite.

3. Review The Weekly AD

Let the AD become your grocery shopping companion. You should get the grocery AD once a week in your mailbox. That’s like your grocery shopping jackpot. It tells you what’s on sale, displays items that have digital coupons and more!

Another thing I never took advantage of that my husband got me into. He rocks.

Once we get the AD I review it and circle whatever interests I have in the AD. It’s a great way to save money and who doesn’t like to save money. Every penny counts these days.

tip: Download the APP for your grocery store. Not all coupons are advertised, always check the APP as well for more money saving deals. 

4. Don’t Go To The Grocery Store HUNGRY

Grocery shopping and hunger are just not a good mix as most of us know. I will throw everything in the shopping cart when I am hungry and it’s usually not the healthiest food.

I highly advise avoiding hunger shopping if at all possible. It’s one way to avoid spending more money then you intended.

tip: Eat before you go, and feed your children before you go. If you must, bring a few snacks with you.

5. Get A Rein Check

Have you ever seen a smokin deal and you go to look for the product and its completely gone!! Like what gives!! It happens every once in awhile and when this happens ask for a rein check!

I had never heard of a grocery shopping rein check before. I gotta say, I love employees that inform their shoppers of things they have been missing out on.

When there is a great deal going and you find out they are out of stock you feel like you missed out. However, you don’t have to miss out anymore, just ask for a rein check.

At check out let your cashier know what you need a rein check on and they will provide a small slip that will honor that price for a certain amount of time, so next time you go to the store and see the product, you will still get the sale price! CHA-CHING.

tip: To avoid this mishap go shopping in the morning or find out your grocery stores restock days.

6.  Take The Free Food To Distract Your Kids

You fed your kid or kids and they are still being squirmy. You have to mentally prepare when shopping with your kids. They are like little ticking time bombs. And if you’re lucky, they don’t explode.

I love our grocery store because in the produce department we have a little thing set up for kids that offers free fruit. I didn’t know about this until an actual produce guy walked me over and showed me. It has been a lifesaver in many occasions. Our bakery also gives out free cookies! You have to ask for a cookie, it’s not advertised, but again, lifesaver.  And SOMETIMES there’s even an older man making popcorn for people!

All you have to do is ask the employees.

Not all stores do it because of allergies but its worth finding out if your store offers some goodies to keep your children distracted for a bit. And it’s also something for them to look forward to, IF they behave.

tip: If your grocery store doesn’t offer anything like this ALWAYS bring a few snacks OR let them bring a play shopping cart. One of my daughters loves to push around her shopping cart. I put a few items in there and I know she loves that she’s helping. GREAT DISTRACTION.

7. Bring A Shopping Buddy

A shopping buddy is essential for me. I have two toddlers and I just never like to chance it with them. Even before I had kids I would invite friends to shop with me. We would grab a coffee, catch up and shop together. It definitely makes the trip more enjoyable.

My parents help me big time with my shopping trips. It’s a fun way to spend time with their grandkids and they get their shopping done too. It’s a win win.

tip: If you bring a buddy break your list in half. One goes one way, one goes the other and you get out of the store in half the time! Score! Treat them to a happy hour! Or invite them over and make them a meal.

8. Create A Meal Plan For The Week

Meal planning will help you avoid food going to waste. I’m not saying you need to have a meal planned from Monday-Sunday, even I’m not that organized. Although I wish I was…….*sigh*

What I’m saying is review your pantry, fridge, cabinets, lazy susan, etc before you go shopping. Look for the items that have just been sitting there for quite some time, make sure they aren’t expired, and search on pinterest or google for meal ideas for that particular food item.

For example, right now I have bread crumbs that have sitting around for however long, a can of pumpkin, and a bag of beans. So, maybe this week I’ll make a meatloaf, a pumpkin chocolate chip bread, and, bean and cheese burritos.

On my grocery list I’ll add the additional ingredients I need to get to make those specific meals.

Too often we buy items and they just end up sitting there till they expire! What a waste of money! Or they get buried between other items and we completely forget about them! It does happen, but you can avoid this by reviewing your cabinets and meal planning.

Tip: Review your Pantry once a week or every 2 weeks to avoid clutter in your cabinets and fridge. As well as avoiding wasted food. And search on pinterest for meal ideas when you can’t think of anything to make with something specific you have. I absolutely love pinterest for this very reason!

9. Have A Budget In Mind

Have a budget in mind, but allow yourself a little wiggle room in case you go over. There have been times I have been embarrassed to tell my husband how much I have spent in groceries. Partly because I didn’t follow these previous tips.

I would go hungry, I would buy things we already had but I forgot, I wasn’t taking advantage of the deals or coupons that I had, if it looked good or sounded good I would buy it, and overall I just wasn’t being the greatest shopper with what I was buying.

Buy only items you need or will use and start keeping track on the average amount of money you are spending. Whatever items you buy often, (exp. milk, bread, butter, peanut butter, etc.)  stock up when it’s on sale.

Going in with a budget will provide peace of mind and allow you to be more in control and less stressed at check out because you already know how much you will be spending.

tip: On many of the grocery apps it tells you exactly how much an item is. You can make a your grocery list and have a total before you even go. If you need to adjust it, you can do it so it fits your family’s budget before you shop.

 

person carrying basket of vegetables
Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

That’s all I have folks. If you have any other tips or tricks for a more pleasant grocery shopping trip please comment! I’d love to hear how it can get better!

 

HAPPY SHOPPING! Wishing you stress free trips every time!

 

 

 

15 MUST DO’S Every Fall Season

The Wild Gems

Fall is one of my favorite times of the year. It’s the closing of a chapter while beginning a new one.

A time to celebrate and embrace the change that surrounds us. The external and the internal.

Fall is a cocktail made of comfort, peace, and complete gratitude. Always sure to give you the warm and fuzzies.

I have put together a list to make every Fall memorable for you and your family or friends!

15 MUST DO’S Every FALL

1. VISIT THE PUMPKIN PATCH

 I feel like this is a given but I know it’s not! I had only ever gone to the pumpkin patch when I had my first born. Before that I just never went. Why? I have no idea! I always just got my pumpkin at the grocery store or some little pumpkin stand on the side of the road. But oh my goodness, the pumpkin patch is its own experience! They are so fun!

Go with your family or a group of friends for a great time! You won’t be sorry!

Note: Most of the pumpkin patches in town or in your town have special features or special events on specific dates. Be sure to look it up and take advantage! Start planning now and mark your calendar.

2. Carve/Paint Pumpkins

Okay, I mention this because how many of you leave the pumpkin carving to someone else. Guilty! I NEVER carve the pumpkin, I don’t know why. Probably because my husband is way better at it than me but this year I am determined!

Make it a contest with your family members or host a pumpkin carving party! Most grocery stores offer pumpkin carving kits to make it that much easier for you!

3. Toast Pumpkin Seeds

What to do with all those seeds after carving that beautiful pumpkin….hmmmm.

Don’t throw away the pumpkin seeds after carving your pumpkin! TOAST THEM! You can find such delicious recipes online! Plus pumpkin seeds are actually really good for you. Toss them in a salad or use as some type of fall recipe topping. Yum.

4. HOST A BONFIRE and make s’mores

Nothing says Fall like a bonfire and some s’mores!

If you don’t want to host one that’s ok, encourage one of your friends to host one! Spend the evening with your friends or family reminiscing while being cozy near the fire.

Maybe add some spiked cider in there as well.

5. Take Advantage Of Everything SEASONAL

I’m talking seasonal. Examples would be soaps, candles, foods, events, drinks,you get the idea! Everything SEASONAL!

All these things are only here for a limited time so if you enjoy Fall stuff as much as me then I suggest stocking up! Pumpkin candles and flavors are my absolute favorite! And of course all the Fall flavors that come out at Starbucks.

6. Make A Homemade Apple Pie

When I think fall I think apples and pumpkins. Make an apple pie or pumpkin pie from scratch! And share it with a friend.

7. Try 3 New “Fall” Recipes

Pinterest is full of fall recipe inspiration! Pick at least 3 new recipes to try!

Here’s something to get you started, PUMPKIN SPICE DONUT BITES

Make some for your friends or your neighbors! You know they will love it!

8. Get A Massage

I really don’t know if getting a massage is a Fall thing. But I could really use a professional full body massage and I’m making it a note to get one!

9. GET CRAFTY

I know you have it in you!

Make a fall wreathe, knit a scarf, get started on a homemade Halloween costume. If you visit Michaels or Hobby Lobby you are SURE to find something fun to make or get started on!

10. Get Started On Christmas Shopping!

Where are my procrastinators at! Just start, do it! Begin that list ! This is what I’m telling myself!

I can’t be doing last minute Christmas shopping anymore. Fall is for shopping.

11. Make A Fall Drink

Oh man, there are so many festive drinks out there! One for whatever you are craving. Invite a friend over and have a cocktail hour!

I have my eye on caramel apple sangria!

12. Get Cozy With A Good Book Or Two

Snuggly jammies, coffee, and a good book. A perfect Fall recipe for any time of the day.

13. Plan Family Pictures

I personally think Fall is the perfect time for family pictures. I love Fall apparel, I love Fall colors, and I love the scenery that takes place in the Fall.

Plus, if you take Fall family pictures they can also serve as your Christmas card picture, if you choose to do them!

14. Go To A Festival

So many fun events take place in the Fall and it’s time to take advantage.

Do a search on google or social media to find out what will be happening in your town or city!

15. Enjoy A Getaway

Take time for yourself or with your family or friends. Whether it be a staycation or a full blown trip. Take some time to escape and enjoy! You definitely deserve it.

My husband and I love camping and about two years ago we went to Disneyland in the Fall, which was a real treat. If you love Disneyland and Fall then you NEED to plan a trip ASAP if you haven’t already experienced FALL AT DISNEYLAND.

 I hope this list inspires you in some way! What will you be doing this Fall!?

Whatever you do, enjoy it surrounded with family and good friends.

9 Childlike Qualities You Need To Strengthen- Regain Childlike Characteristics To A Better YOU

Featured The Wild GemsLeave a comment

 

 

pexels-photo-1149022.jpeg
Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Pexels.com

“It’s The Childlike Mind That Finds The Kingdom”

-Charles Fillmore

The other day my daughters and I left the house to run some errands. I always have to mentally prepare myself when I leave the house with my two toddlers because they are ticking time bombs! They scream and cry really loud when they don’t get what they want or, when they get hurt. It attracts attention that I don’t necessarily want or enjoy. Of course my toddlers don’t care, why would they? I envy how oblivious they are sometimes. Or maybe, I’m just jealous how unconcerned they are with other peoples opinions or reactions.

Referring back, we had some errand running to do. One place we had to stop by was Walmart. We pull up to Walmart, park, and I unload each little one. Holding each one in each hand.

As we are approaching the store one of my daughters looks behind us and shouts really loud, “HI!” and then waves her little hand.

She was waving to a little old man walking by himself into the store.

The little old man catches up to us and he asks, “How old is she?” I reply, “She’s two.”

He then says, “She just looked at me and waved hello, what a difference it would be if more people were like that.” And then he continues to walk ahead of us, and doesn’t say anything else.

In that moment I did imagine if more people were like that. More ‘childlike’. What a different place this would be.

toddler in white hoodie during daytime
Photo by Negative Space on Pexels.com

Children can teach us many things. They are just having fun, and little do they know, they are providing great life lessons and encouraging us to live more freely.

I love children, partly because they are so blunt and honest. They say it like it is and they don’t hold back. They also do what they want, fight for what they want, and are always so determined in whatever they are doing. When you really think about it, it’s admirable.

How many times have you held yourself back, from doing something, that you wanted to do. We always stop, pause, analyze, and over think just about everything. The inner child fades and we become so concerned with irrelevant things.

Here’s a question. How many times have you wanted to act childlike? I can tell you, its definitely been more then once.

I have a small list below of childlike behavior to participate in. Now don’t get confused. Childlike and childish are two different things. I am encouraging childlike characteristics to strengthen and embrace. It may be a little akward and uncomfortable at first. However, most of the qualities below are familiar and not foreign. This is just a different perspective.

carefree child childhood countryside
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

9 CHILD LIKE BEHAVIORS TO ENGAGE IN AND STRENGTHEN 

Here are a few ways that you can be childlike and start our own ripple effect in people around you. These behaviors are effortless, effective, and a great way to release your inner child.

water jumping photographer beauty
Photo by Matthias Zomer on Pexels.com

Give Compliments Whole Heartedly

Lets be real, who doesn’t appreciate a geunine compliment. They make you giddy and joyful. It’s nice to hear something positive about ourselves since most of time we are putting ourselves down. Some of the best compliments come from complete strangers! Be one of those strangers that makes someone’s day!

Children give compliments all the time. They like your hair, they say it. They like your shoes, they say it. They like your cooking, they say. If they like something, they let others know.

Too often we will see something or notice something, think a nice thought in our head, and then never express it. We are constantly thinking compliments in our head but never sharing with the person, place, or thing that needs to hear them. Why is that?

Just say it, type it, or give it. Give compliments freely and do it often. Tell people what you like and appreciate about them!

Become Comfortable Sharing Your Stories

If it’s relevant or relatable share it, heck, just share it anyway! We all have stories and plenty of them. Our experiences, our stories, our journey is what shapes us into who we are. By sharing something personal about yourself or something that you have gone through can really help another person. You just never know because most people don’t voice their stories.

Be different. Be childlike. Share all your stories with those that need to hear them.  Believe it or not but people are interested in what you have gone through in your life so far. How many times have you said to someone you knew, “I didn’t know that, how come you never told me that?” Ask! Talk to those around you and learn their stories.

Your story can provide comfort, reassurance, and an overall awareness.

Children are always sharing random stories. You don’t always understand them but you feel appreciated and valued that they are sharing them with you. When someone shares a story with you its because they trust you. Pay attention to who’s sharing their stories, with you.

Stop Being So Concerned With What Others Think

Easy enough, right? WRONG, I know. Many of us struggle with our image and how we appear to others. We want to fit in, be liked, blend. But where has that got anyone. Most of us are fully comfortable around a trusted set of individuals. Typically family or a few close friends. You are your complete self with them and they accept you for who you are. Yet, we care more about the other peoples thoughts and opinions. The people that aren’t close to us or really even know us. It doesn’t make sense.

Children are ALWAYS themselves, no matter who they are around. They want to dance in the middle of the store to no music THEY DO IT. They feel like screaming because they are excited, THEY DO IT. There clothes don’t match and they look like a bum, THEY DON’T CARE! All children has such unique personalities and what they have in common is they don’t care what others think. They are themselves.

Learn to be yourself and love who you are. 

Do It Yourself. If You Don’t Know How, LEARN.

Most of us wait, we wait and wait and wait. We are under the illusion that things will just come to us and we don’t have to work for it. We put ourselves on a pedestal and think the world is the problem, not us.

Stop waiting. Stop waiting around for things to happen, for people to change, for opportunities to come seizing, etc. You will be waiting for a very long time if you think that’s how things should work. There is never going to be a perfect time. There is never going to be a perfect opportunity. And sometimes, sometimes, you just have to be the bigger person. If you want something done right, as you know you gotta do it yourself.

If there is something that you have been eagerly wanting to do but just can’t figure it out. Don’t just give up, learn or find some way to figure it out. Problem solve!

Children are always eager to do things by themselves. They will discover all sorts of new ways to do things that you never even thought of. I previously mentioned, learn to problem solve. Children are amazing problem solvers! Talk about determination. They will figure out how to get what they want, EVEN IF you take away some of their tools. Yes, they do ask for help at times, but once they figure it out, they won’t ask again. They strive and yearn for independence. That’s praiseworthy. 

Express Your Feelings, Don’t Hide From Them

For whatever reason, we typically bottle up our feelings. We don’t want to offend anyone, we don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, we don’t want to be looked at differently….etc, etc.  You get the idea, because you know there’s truth to that.

I’m telling you to stop doing that, and let your feelings free roam. Bottling them up doesn’t do anything good, for you, or the person/persons that take the hit of the bottle of repressed feelings. Acknowledge how you are feeling. Feel, the feels. If you’re happy let the world know! If you are mad, address what made you mad. If you are sad, reach out to a trusted person.

Children express their emotions openly and freely. They don’t even know how they are feeling but they feel it! The young especially don’t even know what happy or mad is but you do and you see them express it without holding anything back.

Let yourself feel and express it. People are not mind readers. You can’t expect anyone to know how you feel if you don’t communicate it. 

Try New Things For Your Benefit And Theirs

We are so comfortable. Most of us are in some type of trance or autopilot where we typically never step outside the box. Why? Because we have a routine. We know the outcome, we settle, we’re lazy, or we’re scared; to put it point blank.

Get out of your comfort zone. As you’ve probably heard before; become comfortable being uncomfortable. Try new things! If an opportunity arises to do something out of your norm, take advantage of it! Why not! Give yourself a challenge and welcome failure.

How many times do we tell a child, “Just try it,” or “it will be fun, you’ll love it.” And many more things we tell our children to try new things. We are always encouraging or pushing them to step outside their limits. Yet, we are so set in our ways and not willing to try anything new.

Children are eager to try new things and get their hands dirty. They are curious and always welcoming new engagements or activities. New things excite them! They dont even know if they will like it or not but they go for it anyway! If they fall they get back up! If they don’t like it, that’s fine. They will always get credit for trying. 

Learn To Forgive Easily And Move on.

Oh man. How many times have we let such minor things get the best of us. We get upset, we overreact, and sometimes we hold a grudge for days, months, even YEARS! When we sit down and actually dissect the issue, we discover the issue is so small and not worth all the negative energy. It’s hard for us to let things go sometimes. However, the bitterness we carry solves nothing. The only person it hurts is us.

Children don’t hold grudges. They may be upset for a little bit but they are very quick to forgive and move forward. I have had times with my own children where I have yelled at them. I feel so awful afterwards. I apologize for yelling and ask for a hug and a kiss. They give me those hugs and kisses and then proceed like nothing happened. Imagine if we were that forgiving.

We all make mistakes. We are not perfect. We are human. Disappointing others is inevitable. People will continue to fail us and we will fail others. It’s going happen, whether it be big or small. Although, we can choose how to behave. Be childlike when it comes to forgiving and forgive willingly.

Be Empathetic With Everyone and Everything

Put yourself in their shoes. Have you heard that before, or maybe something similar. We can never fully understand what someone is going through or feeling unless we are in their shoes or a similar situation. Until then, we can empathize and strengthen our ability to understand.

Children are extremely empathetic. With everything! People, objects, animals, I mean EVERYTHING. They are so in tune with the feelings of others, its truly amazing. They recognize emotions through their favorite movies, books, other children they see out and about, even some of their toys they are empathetic with. Pay attention to them.

While most of us adults over here are quick to judge, shake our heads, question and mostly we ignore. It becomes abnormal if we can’t understand it. We won’t understand everything that people do, say, etc. Put if we place ourselves in theirs shoes, and analyze the situation we may gain a whole new perspective and things become more clear. We began to empathize.

Be childlike and feel for others. It’s as simple as that. Do your best to understand others.

LOVE Boldly

This one doesn’t need much explaining. Just love and be amazed with all things. Love like a child.

Children love with everything that they have. 

In a nutshell here is a recap of 9 childlike qualities to strengthen

  1. Give Compliments Whole Heartedly 
  2. Become Comfortable Sharing Your Stories
  3. Stop Being So Concerned With What Others Think
  4. Do it Yourself. If you don’t know how, Learn
  5. Express Your Feelings, Don’t Hide From Them
  6. Try New Things For Your Benefit and Theirs
  7. Learn To Forgive Easily And Move
  8. Be Empathetic With Everyone
  9. Love Boldly

Thank you so much for reading! I really hope you enjoyed this post and are able to apply these behaviors and traits into your daily life!

Now go do something fun for yourself! You deserve it!

Please share any thoughts, comments, or something a child has taught you! I’d love to hear it!

pexels-photo-1148998.jpeg
Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Pexels.com

“You Can Be Childlike Without Being Childish. A Child Always Wants To Have Fun. Ask Yourself, ‘Am I Having Fun?’ “

-Christopher Meloni

 

 

Understanding The Love GOD has For You- Creating A Relationship

Featured The Wild Gems2 Comments

 

photo of galaxy
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Psalm: 147:4 He determines the number of the stars; he calls them each by name.

 

Don’t Be A Fool. Recognize Your Dependence On God. As The Days Become Dark And The Nights Become Dreary, Realize That There Is A God Who Rules Above.” – Martin Luther King Jr. 

 

You may already know GOD loves you. You’ve been told he loves you and you believe it and just accept it. But you don’t feel you KNOW IT.

Does that make sense?

.

.

.

.

It wasn’t until I had my first daughter that I really understood God’s Love and how much he truly loves me. Not just me, all of you. We are all his children.

I don’t want someone reading this to feel they will only understand God’s love if they have a child. That was the moment that I realized. You may have your own way or maybe that moment hasn’t arrived yet. Have faith that it will.

In this post I really hope I can help you to understand the love that The Creator Of The Entire Universe has for you. Even if its just a little bit.

grayscale photo of baby feet with father and mother hands in heart signs
Photo by Andreas Wohlfahrt on Pexels.com

Unconditional love is a real. It truly is so real. Unconditional love is a love without any limitations. You just love. You love so much. Having my first daughter, holding this little girl that I created did something to me. I became aware of a love that I didn’t even know existed.

Holding her I knew I would do anything for her, that I would really do anything for her. She is apart of me. She is mine. At that moment, I felt the need to always protect, provide, and guide her in whatever that she does in her life. And I of course still feel this way…..x’s 2 now with two daughters!

Below are two perspectives to think about. That I feel may help you to understand the LOVE that your GOD has for you.

PERSPECTIVE NUMBER ONE

Think of your child or children right now. If you don’t have a child or children imagine for just a moment, that you have a child.

What do you want for them? or What would you want for them?

Just think about that……

.

.

.

Being a parent whether you are a Mother or Father you want the best for your children. You want them to always be happy, to succeed, to not be afraid, to love themselves,  and deep down to always need you and keep you involved in their life.

Because as they get older….. no matter what, you will always see that child in their face. Your heart breaks just thinking of a any time where they won’t need you anymore.

But the truth is, they will always need you and you will always need them.

YOU ARE GODS CHILD. GOD IS YOUR HEAVENLY FATHER

Those things you just thought about…..those things that you want for your child or children or imaginary child……

He wants all those things for you AND MORE. His love is more then unconditional…..it’s…….I don’t even know! It’s MORE!

GOD wants to see you happy, he wants you to succeed, he wants to see you living your life and accomplishing what your soul desires.

PERSPECTIVE NUMBER 2

Think of your child or children again. Or think of your imaginary child.

As a parent you get upset with your child at times. You become frustrated with them. You ask why are you doing that? What was the purpose of doing that? Their behavior at times leaves you baffled.

YOU KNOW THOUGH IN YOUR HEART……NO MATTER WHAT THEY DO, YOU WILL ALWAYS LOVE THEM.

Whenever I get upset, I take a step back and wonder how many times has GOD has asked those questions with me. Why is she doing that? She knows she shouldn’t be doing….why isn’t she listening to me? Those thoughts put me into place real fast.

I forgive my children the way I would like GOD to forgive me, for the times I have disappointed or upset. 

I have moments where I ask my daughters what is it that you want, I can’t help you if you don’t tell me is what I tell them.

GOD works the same way. You need to talk to him. Tell him what you need from him, express your need for guidance and help.

You tell him through PRAYER.

Having a child you want to give them everything that they desire. GOD wants to give you everything your heart wants but if its not expressed through prayer how can he give it to you.

People think, He’s GOD, he should know what I want.

But it doesn’t work like that. A relationship needs to be established.

Here’s an example: 

A Mother has a child. The child needs the Mother. The child relies on the Mother for many things. As the child gets older the relationship they once had changes. The child wants to become independent.

(GOD CREATES YOU)

The child is now an adult. The adult and the Mother do not talk at all anymore. The Mother who brought this child into the world still loves this child and will always love this child even though they have lost touch.

(AS YOU GET OLDER, LIFE HAPPENS, YOU LOSE YOUR FAITH)

The adult does not talk to the Mother, contact the Mother, or wants anything to do with the Mother for whatever reason.

(YOU DONT TALK TO GOD ANYMORE, YOU MAY NOT EVEN BELIEVE IN HIM ANYMORE)

The Mother wants a relationship with the child again but the adult chooses to continue living life without his Mother. He makes the choice to push her away.

(GOD WANTS A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU, BUT HE GAVE YOU FREE WILL)

The Mother wants to help the adult (her child) in anyway that she can.

(HE WANTS TO HELP YOU SO MUCH BUT YOU DON’T TELL HIM WHAT YOU NEED)

But how can she help and give him what he needs if her child will not talk to her.

(GOD TRIES TO REACH, BUT IS CONSTANTLY IGNORED)

She continues to try to establish a relationship with her child again and again. Time after time. But he/she ignores her calls, ignores her letters, ignores anything that has to do with her.

The Mother will never give it up, I can tell you that.

(GOD WILL NEVER GIVE UP ON YOU BECAUSE HE LOVES YOU)

In this scenario GOD is the Mother and you are the Adult (his child).

As I tried to make clear in the parenthesis 

*Re-read that and just think about it*

He tries to talk to you daily and he wants to hear from you. I believe it is so important to build your relationship with your Heavenly Father. That is the key to living your best life.

As a Mother I would be absolutely devastated if my daughters decided not to talk to me anymore.

I want GOD in my life.

I want his help, I want him to know how I am doing, I want his guidance and wisdom to help me live this life.

I KNOW…..I know God wants this from me because I want this from my daughters. I want them to always need me, to always love me, to talk to me, to learn from me.

adult aged baby care
Photo by icon0.com on Pexels.com

John 4:16 And So We Know And Rely On The Love God Has For Us. God Is Love. Whoever Lives In Love Lives In God, And God In Them. 

I hope this post gets you thinking a little bit and helps you to understand how loved you are and how he wants to hear from you.

When you pray and seek wisdom from the Creator Of The Universe, your life will be changed forever.

If you have never prayed or don’t know what to pray for I put together a prayer below to help you re-create a relationship with your Heavenly father.

An guide of what you can pray for,

I pray for my family. That peace and comfort will be provided to them when it is needed and that they pray themselves and create a relationship with their GOD.

I pray to always impact others in a positive way. To always be aware of my actions and words. To be aware who I may be influencing.

I pray to never lose my hunger to learn and grow. That I may take advantage of every opportunity to grow and strengthen myself in all aspects.

I pray for knowledge and awareness. That I will always be aware of what was here before me and what will be here after my time.

I pray for lost souls. I pray that those that are lost will find their way and awaken. That they may find their way somehow.

I pray for wisdom. That I may share whatever wisdom I have with others. Somehow that my story when shared will influence in some type of positive way.

I pray for gratitude. To never take anything for granted and to recognize the things that I do take for granted.

I pray for guidance. That I may be guided in this life to always follow my heart and to hear the inner voice from within.

I pray for protection. Protection from harm, toxic relationships, anything that may damage my soul in anyway or harm me.

I pray for wonder and curiosity. To always ask questions and seek more then I am given. To have the courage to test certain limits with your approval.

I pray for obedience. To always do what is right and to acknowledge and correct when I am in the wrong. To especially obey my intuition when I am being alerted that something is not right.

I pray to be giving. To provide what I can, share what I can, and recognize opportunities to give in anyway. Whether it be a smile, opening a door, contributing to a fund, giving my time to something or someone.

I pray for loyalty. That I may earn the trust of others and stay true to my word. That I may be reliable and provide a relationship that is cherished.

I pray to always recognize that beauty that surrounds me. The beauty in nature, the beauty in relationships, the beauty in man made things, the beauty of the mind and body, the beauty in everything.

I pray to learn from peoples journeys. That I may apply their teachings to my life. That they may help me to reflect and be thankful for where I am and what I have.

I pray for courage. To stand up for what I believe in, for what is right, and to stand for those who can’t. To not worry, and always see the best possible outcome for all things.

I pray for Love. That I may always feel love in my heart. That I may share love with others and help others to love themselves and life.

I pray for the future. That I may do my part in contributing to a better place for future generations.

I pray for forgiveness. To recognize when I am wrong, to acknowledge it, and to ask for forgiveness.

I pray to always be eager to help and support people. To always encourage others to have faith, to inspire, and to make a difference.

I pray for good health. That I may treat my body as a sanctuary and always be cautious as to what I am putting into it. That I may also always recognize when my health needs attention in any way.

I pray for strength against temptation. That I may always be stronger to resist any urge to do something that is wrong.

I pray for patience. Patience with me, patience for myself, patience in all things. 

I pray for these things in the name of the Son Jesus Christ, Amen.

black and white cemetery christ church
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

 

This Post is for my Daughters. I thank GOD for them every day. 

 

God Bless

Thank you for reading. Please share any thoughts.

 

 

 

 

A MESSAGE TO THOSE WANTING TO END THEIR LIFE- You Are Strong and Powerful

Featured The Wild GemsLeave a comment

“…there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger then you seem, and smarter than you think.” – Christopher Robin

green forest tree
Photo by Jimmy Chan on Pexels.com

 

I felt a very strong urge to write this post, I’m not even sure why. I was a little hesitant at first, but I had something that appeared on my “memories to look back on”  on my facebook, and I just knew I had to write this post. Maybe there is someone out there that needs to read this. And if that someone is reading this, I am praying for you.

What trigged me to initially write this blog was a story about a young girl named Katie Stubblefield, who received a second chance at life. A second chance at life is an extraordinary gift that many do not receive.

She is a suicide survivor and her story is miraculous. It is sad. It is heartbreaking. It is hopeful.

…….that girl is going to and is changing so many lives. I wish her and her family the best in all that they do.

When someone chooses to take their own life it raises many questions and many fingers are pointed due to the horrible and tragic event.

It’s heartbreaking.

We don’t know how to react, we don’t know what we can do…… we begin to ask what are the signs to look for, how can we help these people in our lives that may be hurting…… what if this…what if that…..

Those that are suicidal I can imagine are scared, feeling lonely, numb, confused, feeling unworthy to be present and living…

YOU ARE NEVER ALONE IN THE WAY THAT YOU FEEL

This post is directed to anyone who has had or is having suicidal thoughts. I have faith that this message will find who it needs to find. 

I hope this message comes across as genuine and trusting. I know you can overcome this.

These are things I would like to remind you of….

 

landscape photo of road in the middle of mountains
Photo by Gabriel Peter on Pexels.com

YOU ARE LOVED SO MUCH

You are loved so much. You really are. You are loved so much. I want to emphasize that as much as I can because it is true.

There are so many people that care and love you. Sometimes, it may not feel like you are loved. But you are. We all display love differently and the signals can be hard to interpret. However, the love is there. There are people in your life that want to see you succeed, they want to see be happy, they want to see you smile, they want to see you enjoy all that life has to offer. You are someone’s world whether you choose to believe that or not, you are. They live and do all the things they do because of you. Your existence gives life to those around you. You hold such value, that is why you are here to begin with. You are loved.

Love yourself.

Please love yourself and recognize how much life you have in you. You are loved so much. Believe that because it is true.

THIS PAIN WILL NOT LAST FOREVER

It hurts. It hurts so bad. I know you are in pain and it hurts. I don’t know exactly how you feel and those around you might not know exactly how you feel either. But I can tell you, it may seem like you will never escape this pain you’re in, but you will.

On the other side of your struggles there are great things that await you. This is apart of your journey, you have the strength to push past this.

You have to push past this. There are people that need you, that count on you, that love you, that can’t imagine a life without you. You are strong. There are others who have experienced what you are going through and they conquered THIS…..and they didn’t think they ever could. You will get through this too. Please believe that you will get through it.

Acknowledge it, face it, and conquer it. You are stronger then this pain you feel. You are powerful.

HELP IS AVAILABLE

This battle does not need to be handled by yourself. Do not be afraid to reach out for help. Please reach out. There are so many people that want to lend a helping hand. There are so many resources that offer help and assistance. Those that may have been in a similar situation can provide advice and guidance. Hear them out.

Remember, you are not alone.

The help you need is right there. Do not face this demon by yourself. Reach out to your family, close friends, a support group, a stranger even! Tell someone what you are going through and you will look back, and be so thankful you reached out. Don’t go through this alone, ask for help.

YOU HAVE A PURPOSE

Your existence is a miracle. I will say that again, the fact that you are present in this life, right now……is a miracle. You are a miracle! Your life is a miracle!

You are something so special and so unique. You are a gift to this world and the world needs you.

You make a difference, you have a purpose, there is value in your life. You have been given life and opportunities. Someone looks up to you, someone admires you, someone is wanting your life that you are living. Cherish this life that you have. People are praying to be where you are. Be grateful and recognize this beautiful gift that you have been given.

There is more waiting for you. Have faith and believe in yourself.

asphalt dark dawn endless
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

I hope you were able to take something from this small message and that in someway it resonates and encourages you to keep seeking the light that is waiting at the end of this hard road. You are being prayed for.

Remember…

 

YOU ARE LOVED SO MUCH

THIS PAIN WILL NOT LAST FOREVER

HELP IS AVAILABLE

YOU HAVE A PURPOSE

 

 This post found you, take this as a sign that it’s not over. More is waiting for you. One step at a time, you will get through this. 

RESOURCES

suicidepreventionlifeline.org

national suicide prevention lifeline: 1-800-273-8255

WAYS YOU CAN HELP

SHARE THIS MESSAGE FOR OTHERS- YOU MAY SAVE A LIFE

CREATE AWARENESS

TALK ABOUT IT AND REACH OUT

adult background beach blue
Photo by Lukas on Pexels.com

 

 

 

 

5 BOOKS TO INFLUENCE AND ENERGIZE YOU

Featured The Wild GemsLeave a comment
flowers on book
Photo by Dids on Pexels.com

“The More That You Read, The More Things You Will Know. The More That You Learn, The More Places You’ll Go.” Dr. Seuss

He has a point……….doesn’t he?!

Below are 5 amazing books that I feel have either strengthened my mindset, allowed me to view things in life in a different perspective, encouraged me to be more aware of my surroundings or lifestyle, and, overall, I would say have helped me with struggles with personal growth or change that I have been seeking in myself.

If you are ever in a standstill in your life, read a book! There are so many lessons to be learned!

I PROMISE YOU WILL GAIN SOMETHING FROM READING THESE BOOKS BELOW

Grab a cup of joe, a warm blanket, and create a space that is comforting. And start reading!

“…you have hidden treasures within you.” – Dale Carnegie 

I LOVE all of these books and I look forward to sharing another 5 BOOKS TO READ soon!

If you have read any of these I am curious on your thoughts, if you agree or disagree! I want to hear from you!

Knowledge is power my friend.

tip: Have a highlighter near you, when you come across something that really stands out highlight it! It’s nice to go back and re-read what caught your attention in some way!

 

1. THE FRED FACTOR- EVERY PERSONS GUIDE TO MAKING THE ORDINARY EXTRAORINDARY BY MARK SANBORN

beafred.jpg

This book is short and powerful. It’s only 80 pages! However, it withholds  SO much value! Who’d of thought of a mailman being so inspiring, YOU WILL WANT TO BE LIKE FRED, I guarantee it. I believe many of us think you need money to make a difference but that is so not the case. This book underlines how you can create value in other peoples lives without paying a dime! It is eye opening and will help you to appreciate where you are right now in your life. If you need help having a positive attitude this is your book to read! I have highlighted so much in this book!

2. HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE- DALE CARNEGIE

dalec

Dale……Dale. My man, Dale. This book is absolutely AMAZING and I have learned so much from reading this book. It’s small print with a little over 200 pages. I cannot wait to read more by this author because of the helpfulness and new visions that I have gained from reading his book. This book is so well written and provides such great direction toward having a happy life and being successful in whatever you are doing! If you are in business I would definitely recommend reading this book!

3. EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE- DR. DAVID WALTON

EI

This was an interesting and self reflecting read, I really enjoyed getting my mind to think outside the box. This book allowed me to observe myself how others may see me. Not only that, this book helped me to develop more self awareness in myself and how to empathize more with others. We can be so quick to judge sometimes. Not just with others but with ourselves. We are constantly telling ourselves things that aren’t true. We need to be more respectful, mindful,  and more patient with all things.

4. RICH DADS CASHFLOW QUADRANT- ROBERT T. KIYOSAKI

cashflow

Money can be a sensitive topic to most people. To some, its a forbidden subject or not proper to talk about with others. However, this book just lays it all out there which I love. This book helps you to understand the game of money. It helps you to identify which cash quadrant you fall under, and how to get where you want to be financially. Many of us have bad habits with money or we just really don’t know how to handle it. This book will teach you discipline. Hopefully after reading this, money issues will be a thing of the past. I still have a lot to learn! But this is a great start!

5. THE FOUR AGREEMENTS- DON MIGUEL RUIZ

four

I feel this is a pretty popular book but I can understand why! It is powerful and soulful. You will be transformed with a new way of thinking and living. This book is great for self growth, strengthening your spirituality, and opens the doors to new opportunities. One of my favorite things it talks about is the power of our word. Our words are so powerful and can do so much. You will become incredibly mindful with so many things after reading this book. I highly recommend this one!

 

SO there ya go! This is a small list but holds such great power if you allow yourself to learn and grow!

“Free Your Mind, And The Rest Will Follow.” – En Vogue

I am currently reading some great books right now that I look forward to sharing soon! IF YOU WANT TO DO AN ACT OF KINDNESS……SHARE THIS FOR ALL THE BOOK LOVERS!

SIDENOTE: If there’s a book you recommend, please comment or message me! I love books that challenge my way of thinking or can promote self growth in any way! 

 Mmm….coffee and donuts. Have a blessed day! PEACE & LOVE.

a book cup of coffee and flavoured donut on square white ceramic bowl
Photo by Studio 7042 on Pexels.com

 

 

Noticing A Blessing In Disguise

The Wild Gems6 Comments

 “Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.” – Forrest Gump

road sky clouds cloudy
Photo by Gratisography on Pexels.com

(If you haven’t see that movie I just referenced, PLEASE get on that. Very heartfelt and actually very relevant to this post. It’s so good!)

Life is full of surprises……

unfortunately, they don’t all come wrapped up in a giant bow and pretty paper. Damn. They typically come in a storm form; forceful and frightening. I’m sure you can think of a thing or two that has happened in your life that completely caught you off guard. It happens…

When something challenging occurs in your life, it can be very hard to process because they are often unannounced and sudden. You may have even looked up to the sky and asked WHY, why is this happening. You will try your best to understand the reasoning behind an unpredictable occurrence. It’s scary, it is. You have to acknowledge it.

grey white clouds
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Some things happen without our permission, many things actually, and some things happen based on a single decision that you or someone else may have made.

Hard things happen in life. Really hard things that are unavoidable. We all know that, we all go through them. Some harder then others. Everyone knows the pain of heart break in one form or another.

We are not given things that we cannot handle. When we are down, we have to know that we do have the strength to get back up. You are stronger then you tell yourself. Always remember that.

If you look back and focus for a just moment what those hard things were, or, maybe you are going through something right now.

If you are in a storm right now,  I want you to know there are hidden blessings in your hardships. You are being shaped. Believe it and be patient.

Maybe in reflecting, you have noticed a few blessings in disguise in your life.

Reflect right now on some past moments. If the things that happened to you in the past, had not happened, you wouldn’t be where you are right now.

In this present moment, you wouldn’t have the mindset that you do, you wouldn’t have the perspective that you, you wouldn’t appreciate life as much as do.

Hard times in life remind us how fragile and unpredictable life can be. 

Typically when we go through tribulations and heartache it changes our way of life. We can easily become lost in those hardships too, which is why it is so important to have a support system when you are going through something difficult in your life. You are not alone in what you go through. Always reach out. Social media makes it so easy to find people who are experiencing what you are experiencing. Please, always reach out.

woman wearing gray long sleeved shirt and black black bottoms outfit sitting on gray wooden picnic table facing towards calm body of water at daytime
Photo by Oleksandr Pidvalnyi on Pexels.com

When someone you know is going through a tough time in their life, you have to do your best to empathize with them. When it comes down to the core you don’t how this hardship is impacting them. Listen, and be there for them.

Our Blessing In Disguise

I want to share with you a moment in my life that was challenging for me. This became one of the best things in my life.

background image beautiful blur bright
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

 

Remember I mentioned how we all know that life is full of surprises. Well, this was definitely a surprise for our family.

Our family went from a family of 3 to a family of 4 very unexpectantly. Our little piece of unpredictable chocolate.

park

If you read my previous post “Primero Dios” I mention that we just adopted, May of this year. We welcomed to our family permanently this little sassy, curious, messy, little rambunctious, firecracker.

Picture from my previous post “Primero Dios-Find Yourself Through Your Roots” – read it if you haven’t already! This was an amazing experience for me! You’ll know why in that post. 

ella

I will tell you, she has brought a whole new level of love into our home.

But let me also tell you…….it wasn’t that simple as first. It wasn’t easy adjusting, it was exhausting, and it was holy freaking cow, HARD. It was hard for ME. I’m not saying this incident would be hard for you too but it was for ME.

Don’t compare hardships with people, it doesn’t do anything. Its not a competition nor should it ever be. We just need to be there for each other.

When my first daughter was ten months I was having a difficult time with all the “motherly” adjustments. I became a stay at home mom, I hardly got to see my friends, I was lonely, and honestly I THOUGHT a ton. Too much. My mind was all over the place. It started a serious soul searching journey for me. But that’s beside the point. That’s another story I’m sure I’ll share eventually.

Motherhood is HARD. For many different reasons. I have definitely had moments where my girls are crying, and I’m crying. I’ve had many humbling moments as a Mother.

HOWEVER, we also know, it’s absolutely amazing and so much fun! You just constantly want to squeeze them and make them laugh and smile. You get sad thinking of them growing up and becoming their own person. But you’re so excited for their future.

It was just me and her. We had our routine. I was not ready for another baby.

meandyou.jpg

What’s so funny though is when I had my first daughter I would pray and pray for patience. “Please GOD give me patience.” over and over again. I would get to frustrated at times and I felt awful that I would get so upset at my baby.

(Wanting six kids in the past……..OUT THE WINDOW. All you moms made this motherhood thing look so easy.)

My prayer was heard……………

GOD was like,

you want patience my child?

BAM! Here’s another child, this will provide the patience that you need!

I was like,

Whoa…..I was praying for patience, not another child. I didn’t understand…

And then God was like,

be patient.

Went from One to Two REAL QUICK on April 8th 2017. This was an Easter photoshoot I did with them. They were the cutest bunnies that I ever did see!

easterr.JPG

The hardest things in our life will reveal the best things in our life. 

In early April of last year I took my daughter to the mall so we could get out of the house.

So much work leaving the house with a baby, right? I laugh at that now. Little did I know, more work was ahead.

As we are driving home I received a phone call. A phone call that pretty much changed everything at that moment. I was asked to pick up my niece because she was being taken away child services. Her story is not mine to share.

To be honest, this was something that I did not want to get involved with, for many different reasons. My arms already felt so full at the time and then, THIS.

The beginning of my storm. Deciding whether to drive away or face it. Little did I know there was a rainbow waiting for me and my family….

rainbow over mountain
Photo by eberhard grossgasteiger on Pexels.com

Not all things are black and white. Feel all the emotions, go through the transitions, but know in the end there is a light at the end of the tunnel. 

As I was driving home I called my husband who was at work and told him about the phone call that I just received. It turned out he was called too, and he knew already what was going on. He assured me that this wasn’t something that I had to do. Talk about pressure! It was me who had to decide at that moment. I knew I didn’t want to get involved with this, I knew this was going to create conflict and discomfort with many family members. But, I also knew what I had to do.

I was driving home contemplating if I should keep heading home or turn around.

I turned around the car with a crying baby in the back to get another baby. I had to go get her. I had a choice, but was it really a choice?

Now, you might be thinking I can’t believe you were even contemplating and almost didn’t go pick her up. Keep in mind, I’m providing a very, very, very….small glimpse into this situation that occurred.

Challenging moments in someone’s life are personal and not all those are comfortable sharing all their details. Always be respectful of that.

Arriving at the house, many emotions were being felt. Heartbreak and sadness were a few. I literally watched a child be taken away. She went with them, which I had to follow to an office ten minutes away from the house. That type of occurrence is hard for everyone. The ones witnessing it, the ones having to do it, and it is for the parent; my sister in law.

(All incidents and circumstances are different, this one, was especially hard for the parent.)

When children get taken away it’s really easy to blame the parents. Remember when I said, you have to do your best to empathize.

Many factors come into play when shaping who we are. It’s hard to hold things against people when you really don’t know how different you would be, if you had gone through what they went there.

We are all human. We have no room to judge.

adult audience celebration ceremony
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

 

We arrived at the office and my husband ended up leaving work and meeting us there. To put it bluntly, when a child is taken away from home they prefer to place them with family then any one else. Hence, why we were called. If a family member doesn’t take them then they go to a foster family.

I just want to say to those that are foster Moms, foster Dads, foster Siblings, any other foster family members…..you are all incredible. I got a little taste of what you all go through, and I’m just amazed at your work and heart. Truly admirable. All the services and resources that are available for foster children is remarkable. There ARE very good people in this world.

*****When we were at the office our niece (now daughter) was never in our presence*****

My husband and I talked about all of THIS in a small room privately. We literally had to make a split decision. It’s not like we could go home and think about the pros and cons and come back with our minds made up the next day.

If we decided to take her we would have two one year olds. We knew that much.

(They are a month and two weeks apart.) I just kept thinking how hard this was going to be and I didn’t think I could do it. I began thinking how challenging it was with just one baby, and then I’m going to possibly have two and have no preparation for this whatsoever……did I want to take this on?

I also knew the family complications that would be tied to this.

We decided we weren’t going to take her at the moment and to let a foster family watch her.

We tried to view the whole picture and it was a BIG PICTURE which is why we decided that….at first.

Sometimes it seems easier to avoid our feelings, or avoid a situation because we think we are protecting ourselves. However, most of the time we are doing more harm then good.

There was a light at the end…..

walking path way tunnel
Photo by Caio Resende on Pexels.com

The caseworker comes in, and we let her know our decision. This particular caseworker actually kept insisting that it may be in our nieces best interest that she start fresh with a new family and that they already had a family for her. We felt this might be the best thing to do.

After our decision was made I asked,

“Can we say good-bye to her before we go?”

She brought her in, still in her carseat. I began to cry. How in the world was I suppose to let this little innocent baby go. This wasn’t her fault at all. She was so helpless. I just couldn’t go through with it.

That one question I asked…..that single question, is what changed everything! Our lives will always be changing in the blink of an eye. Appreciate all moments even the hardships. They transform you.

When we took her home it was HARD. I mean, extremely hard. For us, for her, and for many family members. She was a year old. She knew she wasn’t home. She cried every night, and she suffered from a few issues at the time. It was overwhelming, heartbreaking, and exhausting. As well as awkward and uncomfortable during family gatherings. This whole incident was taking a toll on many family members. We were all adjusting in one way or another.

We eventually began to have a routine and we had SO MUCH fun!

Everyone was happy for us! It wasn’t uncomfortable anymore! We were excited and grateful!

She was a cupcake for Halloween! Cuteness overload!

cupcake

We also went to Disneyland! Best Friends I tell ya, best friends.

disneyland

We flew to Florida and played at a splash pad at the zoo. Look how little she was!

florida

We enjoyed holiday festivities together!

xmas

Who says you can’t have your cake and eat it too! This was her second birthday.

cake

AND WE DID SO MUCH MORE! WE HAD HER FOR A YEAR AND ONE MONTH. THEN SHE BECAME OFFICIALLY OURS MAY 8, 2018.

The Rainbow

photography of rainbow during cloudy sky
Photo by Alex on Pexels.com

Time does pass, and one day, you will look back.

As time went one. Her being with us was the best thing for her and we transitioned from her “Aunt and Uncle” to being her Mom and Dad permanently.

Couldn’t imagine going through this with anyone else. My husband is the best.

familypic

Adoption Day! What a joyful day! Not just for us but seeing all the other kids being adopted! What an experience. 

adoptionday

It was a huge relief when this day came, let me tell you. It was accepted by everyone

(even my sister in law, her birth mother was happy that she was with us. I know it provided a little bit of peace and relief)

which took weight off our shoulders believe it or not. No longer Aunt and Uncle, she calls us Mama and Daddy.

We knew in our hearts that she was meant to be with us. We all became attached and whole. We are in love. Thank GOD.

landscape sky clouds hd wallpaper
Photo by Donald Tong on Pexels.com

 

Having two little girls the same age is beyond amazing! They are best friends! They make each other and everyone else laugh so much! They entertain each other so I can get things done. I am a better mom because of her.

Girl Mom right here, and loving it!

rpp

 

“Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get.”

-Forrest Gump

.

.

.

.

.

.

Our Little Blessing In Disguise, Our Daughter…

vira

THANK YOU FOR READING!

I want to share that life has an interesting way of working out. Discover your blessings in disguise.

When something expected happens in your life, take it on, accept it, embrace it and have faith that things will work out in some way.

 Have faith and always PRAY.

I look forward to sharing more lessons life has taught me, and how motherhood and marriage continue to fill my heart up with love!

Comments your thoughts or share! I’d love to hear from you!

 

“Primero Dios – GOD First” Find Yourself Through Your Roots

Featured The Wild Gems7 Comments

 

TijuanaTijuana, Mexico

“The greatest challenge in life is discovering who you are. The second greatest is being happy with what you find.” – unknown

Have you ever felt lost in life. Or possibly unsure of your journey, maybe you feel like your life is in a standstill and you don’t know what to do.

Maybe you feel like there is a part of you that is empty and eager to be fulfilled. We all experience that feeling once in awhile, and for different reasons. We all have a story.

I do believe discovering your roots is a huge step into finding yourself again. Being adopted is what lead me down my path. This is my journey.

Being Adopted made me feel lost, has anything ever made you feel lost?

Do you know anyone that is adopted? Maybe you have a sister or brother that is adopted or maybe even a best friend. Have you ever talked to them about how they are feeling? How being adopted has impacted them….how it has shaped them into who they are. Have they expressed an eager want to meet their biological family to you?

They have possibly accepted that there’s a good chance they will never meet any biological family. If they’ve accepted that, you probably have to. I want to encourage anyone adopted or know anyone in search of family members to take advantage of our technology. Ancestry lead me to mine without even trying.

(My name is Marie. This is actually a selfie I took right before we left to meet my family for the first time. It was my birthday and I was so nervous! I posted this on my Instagram and no one really knew I was doing this except family and a few close friends.)

selfie

I’m adopted. I was adopted when I was just infant. I have no memory of the process nor do I remember ever being told I was adopted. I just always knew. My birth mom was not in the best mental state, and my birth father was not a US Citizen. Having just adopted my daughter I can understand and empathize the struggles and toll it takes on everyone through the process. I actually feel very thankful that I was able to experience the process of adopting before actually meeting my bio family.

Life is full of different perspectives. It helps to take a step back, reevaluate your life and ask yourself what is it that you want…

“Perspective is the way we see things when we look at them from a certain distance and it allows us to appreciate their true value.” – Rafael E. Pino

(We officially adopted this little doll 2 months prior to meeting my family! This all couldn’t have happened at a more perfect time! The way she came into our lives permanently is whole different story! Ill save that for another time 😉 . I will say though, she has brought so much joy and happiness into our family. She is a total blessing and I thank God for her. )    

ella

Don’t Judge Another Persons Journey -we are all on our own path. Be patient with yours. You may not know what you’re looking for but just start searching.

Please do not feel sorry for me or anyone else that is adopted. Adoption is an amazing thing. Who in the world knows where I would be right now if God didn’t choose this path for me. I am incredibly thankful. But that is a huge reason those that are adopted don’t go off shouting or sharing, “Hey, I’m adopted.” A typical response we get is, “I’m sorry.” Which, I can imagine makes some people feel bad because they are thinking….wow,  I cant imagine not knowing who my mom, dad or siblings are. I understand that. But don’t tell an adoptee “I’m sorry.” It makes us feel bad, and afterwhile you keep it to yourself because you’re tired of hearing that. You also get tired of answering questions you really don’t know the answers to….but deep down inside you wish you did know. If you know anyone adopted or adopting get excited for them! Adoption itself it pretty remarkable journey.

Alright, that’s a little backround for you. Now, I will share how this all came to be.

Ask and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. Matthew 7:7

Being adopted and not knowing an bio family lead me to wonder a lot about my ethnicity. I can’t begin to tell you how many times I have been asked, “What nationality are you?” Many times my reply was “mostly Mexican.” Because well, that’s all I knew and was told. And then, I would be told countless times, “Really, I see middle eastern in you.” Or, I would get asked, “are you middle eastern?” and I would just start saying, “Yes…yes I am.” (hahah) and they would say, “I knew it!” (hahah who knows! At that time I didn’t know!) It became rather funny just making up ethnicities for myself. My friends that knew my life had fun with it too. This all lead me to ask myself then, what the heck am I?! I was told numerous times by my family, “you’re full Mexican” and I would argue saying that I had to be something else because everyone thinks I’m something else. I was convinced and I was just curious. Once I gave birth to my daughter I had to know more about my DNA and background. Not just for myself, but for my daughter and any other possible children I might have in the future.

(My first born. My little answered prayer. Being adopted and never knowing any biological family is what made me actually want to be a Mom so bad. I wanted someone that was apart of me if that makes sense.

To be a Mother became a dream of mine when I was very young and I always feared and asked what if I can’t have children. I’ll never know what that connection feels like….it scared me. You can imagine the emotions I felt holding this little baby that actually shared my DNA. I can’t express how much love and joy this little girl gave me when she was born.)

firstborn

You have to learn how to control your thoughts and not let your worries and regrets consume you. 

For 27 years, I never knew what my ethnicity was, and then, because of ancestry my answer was just a click away. My results read; Native American, Italian, Greek, Iberian……and less then 3% Middle Eastern. Go figure. This was a huge and very exciting thing for me!! I can’t really describe the joy of finding out this information.

Now if you are unfamiliar with the way Ancestry works. Here it is in a nutshell. You order kit, you receive kit, you spit in a tube, you mail it, and then receive results via email in about a month. I currently have access to my detailed DNA and I can see if I have any DNA matches with family members.

Its amazing, I definitely recommend this service even if you are not adopted. Keep in mind, I didn’t do ancestry to find family. I did it to answer a prolonged question that had been nagging me for years. When I received my results the only DNA matches I had at that time were 3rd cousins and below. I did reach out to one of them but we couldn’t nail it down to exactly how we were related. Still in contact with him today via social media.

“Remember and honor family who come and gone before you, because they had a hand in shaping who you are.” – unknown 

(A small preview of my DNA results via Ancestry)

dna results

Sometimes what you’re looking for in life comes when you’re not looking at all. The unexpected is what changes our lives.

Fast forward about a year and half. I receive an email from Ancestry out of the blue in June of this year. The last time I had visited the Ancestry web was a few months prior. The message read, “Hola Marie! Me sorprendi al obtener mis resultados y ver somos primas en primer grado.”

I don’t know spanish very well, so when I  first read that my response was, “que?” haha! Jk…kinda of.

In other words, this translates to, “Hi Marie! I was surprised to get my results and see that we are first cousins.”

I of course messaged her back explaining that I was adopted and didn’t know much about my biological family, just my biological parents name. I provided the name of my bio dad and you know what her response was….”OMG, that is my Mom’s brother!” Crazy right! Strait out of Telenovela! *Where are my Jane the Virgin fans at!*

“Marie’s life now was the stuff of Telenovelas.” -Narrator 

Lily

 

MI PRIMA! (MY COUSIN! The one that set this all up! AND our first selfie. )

She proceeded to answer any questions I had and let me know how huge our family was. It was incredible. We exchanged numbers and just began texting. It was overwhelming and emotional for both us in different ways. By the end of that day, my whole family knew of me and my cousin finding me via ancestry. Which BTW was completely by accident! She joined ancestry for a whole different reason! She basically demanded that we need to visit and that everyone wanted to meet me. Especially those family members that actually knew about me since the day I was born. The only thing was almost all of my family resided in Tijuana, Mexico. A complete foreign place to me. I was being asked to bring my husband and daughters to a part of Mexico I’ve never been…. with people that I have never met. I was very hesitant as you can imagine.

After many texts exchanges we agreed on a date and time to travel to see everyone. We would meet in San Diego and then go from there.

“Have faith in your journey. Everything had to happen exactly as it did to get you where you’re going next!” -Mandy Hale

(I had butterflies the whole time driving to California from Arizona)

windmill

I kept thinking to myself is this real life, is this really happening? Am I really going to go through with this? Something that I thought would never happen or even planned on happening was HAPPENING!

I let my family and closest friends know my plans and I could tell they were thinking this whole ordeal was a little crazy. Probably thinking, this is dangerous. Yes, they are my family, but at this point they were still strangers as well. I was definitely reminded that countless times by close people in my life.

My husband surprisingly was never worried.  I began to think all these what ifs…..and it really freaked me out. I became scared and untrusting, thinking of all these different scenarios. I actually reached out to my cousin and allowing her to know that I was nervous and scared. Her response to my fear was so genuine and so assuring I knew I had to go through with this. I told my fear to shut the eff up!

“Go find yourself first, so you can find me.” -Rumi

Long story short…WE DID IT! We ended up traveling to San Diego and agreed to meeting at a fun little Italian Restaurant before traveling to Mexico together the following day. I ate way to much bread with oil and vinegar. Remember I mentioned it was my birthday too! Talk about an amazing birthday present! I got to meet my family! We hit it off instantly! Thank God my husband nor myself said the word, “biscuit.” That was our code word in case we had to make a run for it. Come on now, of course we thought about them kidnapping us.

(Waiting in front of Buca di Beppo to meet my cousin for the first time! Excited!)

buca

The interaction was so great we decided to go through with staying the night with them! Close your mouth, its not that crazy, is it?! Her family is amazing! Now I am just reminiscing how great of an experience this was and so thankful I trusted God for this gift of meeting my family. I know this was a gift. I just do.

The best things in life are on the other side of terror.

The following morning we all piled into an SUV and traveled to VIVA LA MEXICO! Oh my gosh it was amazing!! We were scheduled to meet the whole family at 1pm for a gathering. Beforehand we ate some delicious food, they showed us around the city, and we took some fun pictures. One being on a donkey painted like a Zebra. Check it out!

“If you want to change the world, go home and love your family.” – Mother Theresa

BREAKFAST! Mmmm……que rico!

food

Yummy Treats

tjtreats

Talk about awesome architecture! I swear, sometimes I look at things and I’m like, “Man made that….”. My husbands typically laughs at me. 

tj

arch

Look at this beautiful church. Its an open church, there was actually a funeral going on when we walked by. Anyone can go in during any ceremony. Whatever service you have done at this Catholic Church is welcomed to anyone. 

church.JPG

I really enjoyed the markets while visiting! Very authentic and captivating.

market4

market3

market2

A Downtown Mall…very cool and original. It was almost like a maze. 

shops

 

 

 

 

 

 

Crickets anyone? I’m not kidding, the ones on the left are crickets! No gracias!

crickets

OH HEY! It’s the DONKEY I mentioned! Hey Ruben!

ruben

In finding yourself you will have moments you can’t put into words.

The afternoon came closer and we began to make our way to my Uncles house. Butterflies began to swarm in my belly. I was about to meet a group of Uncles, Aunts, and Cousins. I was about to meet the people I always wondered about. I was about to have a dream become a reality, and my husband and daughters got to share this amazing moment with me.

This was so special to me I’m getting choked up just writing this. I felt alone so many times not knowing these people, curious as to the characteristics that run in the family, facial features that I picked up, and inherited traits that I may have acquired. This moment was very surreal.

Some of my Cousins! (Primas)

primas

We had gorditas for lunch. These were being made while we sat around a table just laughing and crying! Like I said before, this was very emotional for all of us. The food was SOOOOOO GOOD! I’m craving some now!

gorditas

Everything you will come to you at the right moment, be patient and always be grateful.

Many smiles, many hugs, many laughs, plenty of happy tears and plenty of food happened that afternoon. My face even got pushed into a cake! But I’m not sharing that picture! The love that was surrounding all of us that day is indescribable. This moment I shared, was something I will treasure forever and I already cant wait to plan our next trip and see my family! Hope you all enjoyed getting to know me a little better.

Special thanks to  for its amazing service and countless opportunities. Thanks to my cousin and her family for arranging this gathering and taking a leap of faith to allow us into their lives. Huge thanks to my family and friends that supported this adventure and kept us in their prayers. And one more huge thank you to my family in Tijuana that welcomed us with loving arms and took such great care of us! Love you all!

SOME OF YOU might be asking wait….did she meet her birth dad or does she know anything about her birth mom? Does she have other siblings out there too?

I guess you’ll have to wait and see.

Embrace the Journey, Embrace Change, Embrace life. Go Find Yourself. Know Your Roots.

Share this story, comment, or ask me any questions!

Thank you for taking your time to read some of my journey! As my family says,

“Primero Dios!” If God wants it to happen, it will happen.