Category: marriage

Keep Your Home Always Tidy By Developing These 9 Practices

The Wild Gems

I truly enjoy having a clean and tidy home. Who doesn’t right? It feels good when you’re home is nice and clean.

Now, is my house spotless? Absolutely not! I have kids for crying out loud. I have one child that can make a mess with a single almond, I’m not even kidding. How she does it, I have no idea.

But for the most part I would say our house is pretty tidy most days, considering. I take pride in that most days my house is pretty nice and tidy. Especially with having toddlers running around….. that don’t listen….. and touch everything with their dirty little hands. And I’m sorry but I know you hear little toddler boys are dirty but so are little girls. Believe me.

Let’s just say I wouldn’t be scrambling if an unexpected guest were to arrive and that makes me happy.

Mess causes stress. It really truly does. Your living environment plays a huge role in your life and mood whether you choose to believe it or not.

When I was pregnant with my third child I knew I was going to need to get more organized and become more structured with our home life. And I did, and I’m so happy I did! I don’t worry about spending anymore time asking myself how did it get like this and I am going to share my practices with you all!

I’ve learned that if I can just get into some good habits and maintain what I know needs to be done then I won’t spend so much time playing catch up. Only took 3 kids, but hey, you live and learn.

Keep Your Home Always Tidy By Developing These 9 Practices

photo of a white door with a hanging wreath and welcome decor
Photo by Jessica Lewis on Pexels.com

 

Practice Number 1. Downsize And Sort Through Your Belongings Monthly

If in general you spend a lot of time organizing, sorting, or even looking for things, then, that’s a sign you might want to downsize and possibly get rid of some stuff. As Marie Kondo would suggest, if it doesn’t give you joy, get rid of it. Many of us possess so much and so much of that stuff we don’t absolutely need. Many of us also hold on to things for just in case. All it really does is add clutter and eventually other things get mixed in with it and before you know it your closet or garage or whatever is full of STUFF.

Downsize and ret rid of stuff! Have a garage sale or donate.

Practice Number 2: Create A Cleaning Schedule

Create a cleaning schedule and just do your best to stick to it. Some days may be missed, or you may have to push back one thing or another, and that’s ok. The idea is having a schedule, writing it down, and then doing your best to hold you and whoever else accountable.

Write down everything, and I mean everything that needs to be done around the house. Daily, weekly, monthly….start with that.

Practice Number 3: Train Your Kids To Clean After Themselves

Kids are capable of cleaning up after themselves. It may not be to your standards but that’s ok! If you’re constantly cleaning up after your kids they will always expect that. Have them put toys away when they are done playing, tell them their cups or bowls go in the sink when done, encourage them or invite them to help with chores such as putting the dishes away or doing laundry.

Make it a fun game or create incentives for them! However l wouldn’t always give them a reward for cleaning up. Then they will always expect a reward. Teaching them to clean up after themselves will develop good habits for the long run. At least I hope so!

Practice Number 4: Create A Chores List

Having a schedule is one thing but then it’s time to figure out who does what. It’s not fair to have one person doing everything around the house. Figure out who’s doing what so everyone can be held accountable for their tasks. When people know what duties they have there’s no guessing on what they need to do.

Practice Number 5: Do Dishes After Every Meal

Once you’re done with the dishes try to avoid putting them in the sink and saving them for later. Just load it in the dishwasher right away or wash it right then and there. You will be so happy if you can get in this habit. Encourage the rest of the family too to put their dishes in the dish washer. It saves time and avoids a sink and counter full of dirty dishes that you are dreading to do.

Practice Number 6: Fold The Laundry Right After It’s Done

If you can’t fold the clothes immediately after they are washed then do your best to fold them the same day you washed them. Throwing them on the bed or couch and letting the pile build up puts you in a bad mood and then now you’re spending what feels like wasted time folding all these clothes you’ve been avoiding.

Practice Number 7: Tidy Up Wherever You Go

If you’re in a room and see things out of place just tidy up real fast. It’s that easy! When we start telling ourselves we’ll get to it later before you know the whole house is upside down and you’re wondering what happen. Give yourself ten minutes multiple times during the day to do a quick tidy up. You’ll be surprised how much you can get done in ten minutes when comes to a quick clean up.

Practice Number 8: When You See Something That Needs To Be Done Around The House, Write it down

On your cleaning schedule include a time for “House To-Do List”. Whenever you notice something write it down on a to do list. I make a note in my notes app on my phone. These are things that you notice while doing something. Examples would be like cleaning the micro wave, noticing some spots on the walls that need to be wiped, looking up and seeing dust on the fans, wiping the baseboards, sweeping the porch, cleaning the front door, you get the idea. Then, on your cleaning schedule include time for “House To-Do List” (pick 2 or 3 things from the list to take on) and continue this daily or weekly on your schedule.

Practice Number 9: Put It Away Once You’re Done With It

Whatever you’re working on, doing, making, etc, put it away when you’re done with it. Way easier said then done, I KNOW. But do your best to not just place it on the counter, throw it on the floor, lay it on the bed, or better yet, leave it there. Put whatever it is in it’s place and just be done with it. This habit is one of the best ones to establish and to encourage amongst other family members!

round brown wooden end table
Photo by Lisa Fotios on Pexels.com

There are my 9 practices for maintaining a nice and tidy home!

I know it can be very stressful and overwhelming with toys all over the house, the sink full of dishes, a couch full of clean clothes that need to be folded, dog poop that needs to be picked up, floors that need to be cleaned…..ETC. It’s a lot! I really hope these tips can help you and you will start implementing into your life and daily routine! I know it will be worth it!

Life does get busy. However taking the time to create a game-plan will benefit you and the rest of your family. Plus these tips I have shared will give you back more time with your family and isn’t that what you really want?

Best wishes!

 

Quiet Activities To Do With Your Spouse Once The Kids Fall Asleep

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What do you and your spouse do once the kids fall asleep?

Do you both get on your phones, or attend to solo activities that don’t involve each other? Be honest!

First of all, there is absolutely nothing wrong if you do those things. My husband and I spend many evenings like that. We each have our own things we want to do or catch up on.

However we both know that when the kids are down for the night that it’s also an opportunity to spend some time together. Might not be able to go on an actual date but we can definitely do an activity with one another.

I have a list of activities below that you and your spouse can do once the kids fall asleep. They are fairly quiet activities so both of you won’t have to worry about waking up your kids. 

Quiet Activities To Do With Your Spouse Once The Kids Fall Asleep

1. Do A Puzzle Together

Honestly, when is the last time you’ve even done a puzzle? This is a great quiet activity with many benefits for the both of you. Lowers stress levels, delays dementia, improves your memory, and that’s just a few! There are so many “puzzle levels” out there, so have fun picking one out together and accomplishing it together.

2. Watch A Movie Or A Documentary

Netflix, amazon prime, red-box. Movies are so accessible these days. And there are a lot of great ones out there! A great opportunity to snuggle with your honey like old times. While cuddling you two will be increasing your oxytocin levels, which, makes you both feel calm and at ease. I knew I loved cuddling for a reason. 

4. Give Each Other Massages

Light some candles and bring out the essentials oils. Another great stress reliever. We could all use less stress right?

Go full body. If you’ve never had your butt massaged you’re missing out my friend.

5. Do Self Portraits of One Another

We’ve all seen Titanic right? Where Jack does a self portrait of Rose and she’s naked. I’m not saying you need to be naked but definitely have fun with this one. Make it a competition and have your friends pick the best one!

warning: you both may begin to laugh uncontrollably. 

6. Read Together

Whether it be magazines or a novel this is a great time to stimulate your brain and then have an open discussion about what you’re reading.

7. Give Each Other A Foot Rub

Currently getting a foot rub now as I write this haha. Have I mentioned how much I love my husband.

This is such a great thing to do for one another. It’s relaxing, feels good, and gets the blood flowing!

8. Go Outside And Stargaze

This obviously depends on the weather. But if the weather is nice pull out the lawn chairs and just enjoy the stars. Let the deep convos begin. What is life?

9. Cook Or Bake Something Together

The possibilities are endless! Don’t make it too complicated of course. You could make cookies, prepare some overnight French toast for breakfast (yummm), get messy with rice krispy treats, make some French bread pizzas, etc!

10. Slow dance

I’m such a sucker for the lovey dovey stuff. Turn the music on low, dim the lights, and just dance. Something so simple yet so intimate. Dance to your wedding song and get lost in the moment.

Have you heard the song Heaven by Kane Brown? Oh my goodness, you’ll cry.

11. Do Yoga Together

Yoga is a great way to wind down and enter a relaxing state of mind. You two can get even more creative with couple yoga poses. If you two end up laughing hysterically because these couple poses are winning, I say embrace it.

12. Do Facials Together

Try a DIY facial or get some sheet masks from the store. Definitely take a picture. Who doesn’t love a refreshing face to kiss later!

13. Play Cards Or A Board Game Together, Like Scrabble

Bring on the nostalgia. Let the inner child be exposed and start reminiscing with one another. A great time to learn even more about each other and how you want to raise your children.

14. Make Ice Cream Sundaes Together

Go all out and do full on ice cream Sundaes! I’m talking hot fudge, nuts, cherries on top, whip cream, the works! Or make up your own type of Sundae together! This is teamwork if you ask me.

Or, just have ice cream cones like this couple pictured above, they look like they are having fun.

15. Plan A Vacation

Make some coffee or tea and take a moment to dream together. Plan a trip and write down some goals you two would like to accomplish. You two are more likely to accomplish those goals when you write them down. Once you’re done writing your goals place them in an area where you two can see them often.

16. Take A Bubble Bath Together

Dim the lights, light some candles for a very relaxing and intimate time. Pop open a bottle of bubbly or open a bottle of wine. Relax.

Remember the scene in Pretty Woman? You two can recreate that. If this leads to something else, don’t look at me!

17. Have A Staring Contest

Believe it or not looking into each other’s eyes is a very intimate thing. Fall in love with each other all over again with this fun activity.

Tell each other why you love one another. Sounds cheesy, but you’ll never forget the sweet things he ends up telling you.

There ya have it! A few quiet activities you can enjoy with your spouse once the kiddos are sleeping tight!

Any quiet activities you would like to share? I’d love to hear it!

As always, thank you for reading and I hope you can have fun and become closer to your spouse with a few of these!

If You Have Been Experiencing Mom Guilt, I Want You To Try This

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Being a Mom can be challenging. That’s the truth, and for many different reasons and unique situations.

While Motherhood is absolutely amazing and very humbling, it’s full of struggles, hardship and what many other Mothers would call ‘Mom guilt’.

You really won’t hear too many Mothers going around talking about the struggles they have with parenting, a lot of times we keep our hard times to ourselves.

Why? Because we are ashamed to even have these feelings and emotions. We feel embarrassed and unworthy at times. It’s difficult when these types of moods occur.

I got to a point in this Motherhood journey where I knew I needed to change myself. Some of my actions were definitely uncalled for. How could I expect my little one to control their temper when I could barely control my own.

I found myself constantly complaining and it felt like I was pouring out nothing but negative things. I was loosing my patience on my toddlers. I was crying because of my behavior. I was disappointed in myself. I couldn’t believe some of the things I did and said. I truly felt unrecognizable.

My faith has always been important to me. Even more important and guiding once I became a Mother. I knew at this point where I was that I needed to be put in my place. I needed perspective and I needed an adjustment in my attitude.

When I decided that I needed to do something, a devotional book came to mind. In the past I would watch motivating videos on YouTube in hopes of being inspired or driven in some way. This time, I wanted something tangible and something that I could reference back to when needed.

I also knew a devotional book would strengthen my relationship with God, which is what I really needed. I needed help with Mothering my children because I was tired and burnt out to say the least.

I went onto amazon and I believe I typed in, ‘women’s devotional book’. Trusting God Day By Day: 365 Daily Devotionals by Joyce Meyer was one of the books that showed up in my search.

I choose that specific devotional book because of the numerous great reviews.

Mothers, I want you to try reading a devotional everyday, preferably from a devotional book. I personally suggest a book because more is said then just the devotional itself. Insight is shared, perspective is gained, and the author finds a way to connect you with their words, that you can apply to your every day life.

Try reading a devotional first thing in the morning, if not first thing in the morning then sometime during the day. 

(note: When you are reading your devotional have your bible, a journal, and a pen handy. Write down whatever stands out to you, or write down more specifically, what it means to you.)

I would like to share that reading a devotional everyday has truly helped me with my Mothering. I am more patient then I was, I am more empathetic, and I have gained more self control.

A few slips are going to happen. You’re human. However you will get closer and closer to where you want to be. You got this Mama! I am praying for you!

This is the devotional book I am currently reading daily and I am so grateful!

I’m so incredibly thankful for this journey and my beautiful daughters who have brought new colors into my world. Thank you so much for reading. I hope this will bring more peace to you and your family if you choose to try this.

@coffeewafflesandmotherhood

Mama’s Summer Sun Tea

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When I think of summer time, I think of long sunny days. Living in Arizona, I think of long sunny REALLY HOT days lol.

But what’s great about these summer days is they are perfect for making sun tea. One of my favorite drinks to sip during these blazing hot days. I remember my mom making sun tea when I was a kid, and now I have a husband who requests this sun tea constantly.

My daughters enjoy this tea too. So you could say it’s husband and kid approved. However I don’t let my kids drink too much of it because of the caffeine. They have enough energy!

Now let’s make some of Mama’s Summer Sun Tea!

WHAT YOU NEED:

A large glass jar or pitcher that can hold 14 1/2 cups of water

4 teabags of Lipton- iced tea 100% natural specially blended for ice tea (24 family size tea bags)

1 cup of sugar (not Splenda or any “healthy sugar”, just sugar!)

Fill up a large GLASS jar with lid of 14 1/2 cups of water. Then place outside all day in direct sunlight. I typically leave my jar out from 10am to 7pm. Remove tea bags, and add 1 cup of sugar into tea and mix. Let chill overnight, THEN ENJOY!

You can even get more creative and add sliced lemons, fresh raspberries, or peaches to the tea. You can leave it unsweetened too if you prefer. This is the way we enjoy it and it’s always a treat!

Hope you enjoy! Let me know how you like it!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When Your Kids Are Distracting You And Your Spouse From Spending Quality Time Together

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Remember how much freedom you and your spouse had before you had kids? Sleeping in together, staying out late, going wherever and whenever you wanted, you can recall I’m sure. Now your schedules are almost entirely planned around your kids. And you notice how you’re always busy now? It’s crazy right.

Having kids completely changes your lifestyle and it changes your relationship with your significant other.

You will face many challenges together with raising children. In this post I am only going to discuss one challenge and share with you what has worked for my husband and myself.

The Challenge:

Distracting you and your spouse from spending quality time together.

When you have kids, it can be a little challenging to maintain that one on one time with your spouse. With dates and intimacy.

It’s so important to keep your relationship thriving even when you have children. Let this be an opportunity to get creative and step outside your box.

My husband and I love our daughters so much. They are our world. However we do have moments where we reminisce about how spontaneous we were in the past and how completely oblivious we were to our freedom.

It’s amazing how you don’t really recognize how much freedom you have until a child enters your life.

Something we both have learned with having kids is time together has to be planned and scheduled.

Of course that’s not how it is all the time, but I would say a majority of time if we want to be alone it has to be planned in advance.

Just because you and your spouse have kids now doesn’t mean the love needs to be let go. Your relationship still needs to be a priority. And yes, it will take more work then what it did in the past.

I’m sure some of you are thinking, well I don’t have a baby sitter, or our schedules are so different, or possibly, I try but he isn’t willing, etc,

As I mentioned previously, this is an opportunity to get creative.

If you can’t get a babysitter or don’t feel comfortable leaving your children yet don’t sweat it. That was exactly how my husband and I were. We would have “at home dates” and still do! I would have our girls skip nap time so they would go to sleep early so we could spend time together, just me and him.

(As I said, we still do this. Some of the evenings of just eating ice cream together or watching something on TV take me and him back to the old days.)

When your schedules are different you need to take advantage of every moment together.

For example: You two only have mornings together. Maybe share coffee together and do a question of the day about one another. Remember, step outside the box.

(Note: Stay off your phones when you two are together. How many times have you witnessed a couple out together and they are both on their phones. Talk, listen, hold hands, BE PRESENT.)

Both of you need to be willing to try new things. If one of you is trying and one of you isn’t, there may be a deeper issue that needs to be resolved.

In that case, I might suggest help from a professional.

Discuss Your Relationship.

You two need to be on the same page and open to embracing this new chapter in your relationship. You won’t have to be so creative forever or plan every moment together forever. Your children are going to grow up.

But are you both happy right now? Have you sensed that you two are drifting apart or something just feels different. More then likely both of you aren’t getting enough attention from one another.

If these emotions have occurred this is your relationship craving some immediate attention. If you’re reading this there’s good possibility you’re in this situation.

In a nutshell I am saying, TAKE ACTION. Don’t allow your children to be the excuse anymore. 

Here Are A Few Moments To Always Take Advantage Of:

  • Bed time
  • Nap time
  • When they are on a play date or at a friends or with family
  • When they are glued to a game or YouTube
  • A Family Gathering
  • A birthday party
  • When they fall asleep in the car
  • In the morning before they wake up
  • When they head to school

…you get the idea.

These are all opportunities where you two can discuss something, plan something, do something, etc. Both kids fell asleep in the car? Go get something in the drive-thru, pull over, and enjoy it together. Kids are sleeping? uh, HELLO! Have some private time. At a gathering of some sort? There’s enough adults watching the kids, get playful. You can still be spontaneous, it will just be in a different way.

Also, it’s definitely more then OK to put other things on pause to give your spouse the attention they deserve and need.

Keep the sizzle and have fun. You’ll be laughing about these moments in the future and sharing them with your children.

A book I would highly recommend to strengthen your relationship with your spouse is titled The 5 Languages Of Love by Gary Chapman.

I definitely recommend this book even if your relationship is thriving right now! It’s an amazing eye opener and will bring you two even closer.

What works for you and your spouse, I’d love to hear it!