Something I’ve noticed is that we humans are in a constant search for distractions. It’s not just that we “need” them; we’re almost addicted to them, each for our own reasons. Distractions aren’t inherently bad, but when we feel a constant need for them, we can become disconnected from ourselves and our surroundings. Often, this craving for distraction arises from fear. Fear is powerful, and instead of trying to understand it, we turn to distractions as a defense mechanism—to alleviate its weight. But distractions can only take us so far; fear will continue to re-emerge until it’s faced.
In a way, fear is there to “protect” us. Yet, ironically, it’s also what holds us back from fully living. Take time to look within and understand your fears. Ask yourself: where is this coming from? Your soul, your spirit, isn’t what’s afraid; it’s your mind and body.
Take moments to put down the distractions and face your inner world, as challenging as it may feel. Gently explore what lies beneath the surface—your fears, your worries, even your dreams. When you stop running from your fears and start understanding them, you’ll find yourself becoming more present, more aware, and more connected to your true self. It’s a journey we can all take, step by step, allowing ourselves to truly live without constantly seeking an escape.
Have you ever spent time looking all over your home for your glasses, only to discover they’ve been on your head the whole time? Or maybe you searched everywhere for your phone, only to realize it’s been tucked in your back pocket? Sometimes, life is like that. What we’re searching for to fill a certain void isn’t out there, it’s already within us.
You might think a specific achievement, possession, or relationship will finally make you feel complete. But when you get it, that familiar emptiness still lingers, leaving you confused and wondering, Why do I still feel this way?
The truth is, the answer you’re looking for is right where you are. To find it, spend time getting to know yourself, just like you would with someone new. What makes you tick? Why do you react a certain way? What brings you peace? What made you feel alive as a child?
Keep asking yourself why, and dig deeper. “That’s just who I am” is rarely the whole truth. You are layered, complex, and beautifully unique. Discover the colors, textures, and tools that shaped you into who you are. Not every discovery will be easy—some may be painful—but that’s part of the journey. Vulnerability strengthens our connections with others, and being vulnerable with yourself does the same.
No one in this world knows you the way you do. You alone hold the knowledge of your experiences, your dreams, your fears. And you are worth knowing. You are worth your own love. Take the time to see yourself for the miracle you truly are.
There was a moment when my children were younger, and we were watching The Cat in the Hat on PBS Kids. The Cat asked, “What makes a bird a bird?”
You might think the answer would be the ability to fly, but that’s not quite right. Penguins are birds, and they can’t fly.
The answer is actually feathers. That’s what sets them apart.
This got me thinking: What makes a human a human? It’s something to ponder.
I loved that I learned something or that my curiosity was sparked by something as simple as a quote from a kids’ show.
What I learned from that was that sometimes, what seems obvious at first has extra layers waiting to be discovered—or an answer to a question might seem obvious, only for you to realize it’s not the answer you thought.
Lessons are like that—they keep revealing themselves over time. For example, when you rewatch a movie or reread a book, you often pick up on something new you didn’t notice before.
But it’s not just books or movies—lessons are all around us. They can be found in nature, in conversations, in the innocent perspective of a child, or even in a kids’ show. Each lesson we learn shapes our actions and attitudes, creating a ripple effect.
Just as a small act of kindness can spread and inspire others, the lessons we internalize can encourage us to uplift those around us, making a meaningful difference in the world.
The key is to stay open, curious, and willing to learn, even from the simplest things.
Sometimes life teaches us in whispers, and it’s up to us to listen.
At one point or another we’ve all done it.Wehave avoided responsibility and placed the blame on something. Our parents, our childhood, our lack of not knowing better, our friends, God, that door for being in the way that just stubbed our toe, etc.
It alleviates the guilt or negative feelings that we fill inside….but deep down we all know that choices, decisions, and reactions are our own.
Many of us prefer to play the victim rather than scatter the broken pieces and discover a new creation.
What good does blaming do? Truthfully, is there a positive outcome to making that choice?
Before you start pointing fingers, make sure your hands are clean
Bob Marley
He who has not sinned can cast the first stone
Jesus
I love these quotes, both of these shout LOOK AT YOURSELF. And reminds us that we are flawed just like the rest.
You’re not alone.
My kids are at that delightful age where there’s a fair amount of tattling and a great deal of blaming one another.
“Mom, she made me do it!”
“It’s not my fault, it’s theirs.”
“I only did it because she told me to do that.”
*something doesn’t go their way* – “This is YOUR fault!”
And so forth.
This kind of stuff is expected right now. They are kids!
Although,
I do believe there is importance in teaching children accountability, acknowledgement, and acceptance. As we know, you can’t point the finger forever.
There comes a time when each of us have to look at ourselves, reflect on our own choices and decisions and take accountability for our part. Whatever that may be.
I would say a majority of people don’t enjoy doing this. It isn’t a pleasant process. It’s like holding hands with guilt and shame while walking down an empty road. You don’t want to hold their hands but they know where they are going and you don’t.
This is necessary for our own personal growth. Especially if we have a goal to be our very best selves and want to move forward and make improvements in our life.
There are many grown ups out there who still behave like children and are saying exactly what my kids are saying.
“This is all YOUR Fault!”
And guess what the other grown up is saying,
“No, this is your fault!”
Neither grown up wants to take accountability for their part. How will the issue get resolved if someone doesn’t step up?
Again, because it’s hard. Who wants to admit when they are wrong? Be honest.
Let me share something,
when you begin to take accountability for the directions and outcomes in your life, your life changes. Someone may argue, “but I got dealt a bad hand of cards.”
Maybe that person did. There are many lives out there who have truly been dealt a shitty hand of cards. But there are also lives out there that even with their bad cards they played a heck of a game.
Even in poker you can win a game with a bad hand.
Learning to take accountability and learning to acknowledge what is changes your life, and it changes for the better. In doing so you learn to give yourself grace which leads to giving others grace. You learn to forgive yourself which leads to you forgiving others.
Everyone needs grace and forgiveness. If you can learn to give it to yourself, you can learn to give it to others.
We cling to too many pains and aches from the past. They are like anchors that hold us down from exploring.
And then we blame those pains and aches for the outcome of our lives. When all we have to do is release the anchor so we may set sail. We get frustrated at the knot that we tied.
Living a life of pointing the finger will do nothing but poison you. It poisons you to the core.
And if you keep letting your pointer finger poison you, eventually it paralyzes you.
That is not how you want to live your life. Beautiful things await when we acknowledge ourselves, our situations, our reactions, and recognize that we hold in ourselves more power than we know.
You are powerful. You are strong. You have strength inside of you to get you through what you are going through. It’s nobody’s fault.
Pain in our hearts can lead to bad choices. Think about that, and ponder it.
You’ve probably heard someone say once or twice before, God is good. And how would you define that phrase?
I feel like I’ve had some type of revelation and I’m excited to share it. God is good.
In the past whenever I would hear that phrase I would repeat to myself, God is good. But then think, what does that even really mean?
How do we interpret that? Well for one, we can look around at nature and be astonished.
Like, are you aware of what an octopus can do! It’s pretty spectacular. That in itself points to an incredible creator.
But God also reveals his work and skills in tribals and in times of distraught.
Let me share a little story that just took place a couple of days ago. A story of my daughter getting some deep splinters and what unraveled into a spiritual lesson.
At our house we have a little wood deck that my husband actually made. Picture a yard of turf, then you can two steps onto this wood deck that bridges to a giant sand pit.
Our daughters have so much fun in our backyard. Tons of laughing and imagination. My husband and myself always say how much we love just watching our children play. It’s truly a blessing.
Well one late afternoon the girls and I had just got back from picking up a half pepperoni and half cheese pizza. The girls raced to the trampoline to play with the puppies that we just recently got (2 border collie pups, too cute. But they chew on everything!) I shouted to come inside to eat and then………
Then, I hear screaming. I look out the window and my 3 year old is sitting on the wood deck, head down, crying hysterically. Echoing through out the neighborhood. My other daughter is shouting, “‘mom! She has a splinter!” I knew it was bad. This wasn’t the first time that this type of situation has happened.
I had just sat down too and taken two bites out of my pizza. I thought of course, this is parent life. I walk over to the deck nonchalantly (I’ve learned it’s best to not react too much when they’re in distress. Makes it way worse) and look at her foot. I see it and think, shit.
There’s 2 splinters that are deep in her foot. These won’t be easy to pull out with just tweezers, she’s going to need “surgery”. I call my husband and tell him what happened. Luckily he was already on his way home from work. He tells me to soak her foot in water. I take her to the bathtub.
That was a struggle as you can imagine with a 3 year old. Although it quickly became a party in the bathroom. Her sisters were there fully supporting her. One is feeding her pizza while the other is making her laugh with silly gestures. Her foot is soaking in the water, she’s got a lollipop in her hand, a “bravery” light up watch/bracelet, and her unicorn baby doll. At this point she’s calmed down a little.
Then dad gets home.
She begins to cry hysterically all over again which I totally understand. It’s like when someone asks, “are you okay?” when you’re totally not and you begin to uncontrollably cry. We’ve all been there right?
My husband looks at her foot and with no hesitation but complete confidence says, “I can get those out.” In my head I’m thinking, ummm are you sure, did ya see her foot, and I even suggest urgent care. I reiterate that they are deep and I don’t know if he can do it. My confidence in him is slim.
He says, we’ll wait till she’s asleep. Or we can leave it and let her body reject it. I wasn’t for the latter, I wanted those wood pieces out of her tiny little foot. Splinters can be painful! We all know this.
She quickly falls asleep, I’m sure to the exhaustion of crying. My husband gets all prepped up for “surgery”. I say that with a sense of humor. Our daughter rests on our bed. I give him his space while checking periodically on the both of them.
In this inconvenient moment I think about how amazing my husband is and I think about what a great dad he is too. This is when God comes to mind and the spiritual message enters.
In this moment my husband revealed to me once again what he’s capable of. I saw him in a different light caring for our daughter, coming to her rescue, and even our other daughters took notice watching their daddy take care of their baby sister. As one of my daughters watches from afar she says, “Daddy’s my hero”.
I believe God works and reveals Himself in similar ways. How would we know how great God was if it wasn’t for the hard times. How could God show us what He’s actually capable of doing if it weren’t for those muddy waters that we get caught in? It’s in these times of fear and pain and discomfort that God steps in and says, “I got you, wait till you see how I’m going to heal you and make this better again.”
Do we trust God? Let’s be honest, not always. Like my 3 year old daughter with splinters in her foot, instead of surrendering her foot and letting us help her she held her foot close to her and kept it restricted. We had to wait till she was asleep before we could even touch it!
It’s these moments, which can be unbearable moments that actually bring us closer to God. He reveals different sides that we never knew. We learn more of Gods capabilities, powers, and healing through these moments.
My daughter getting those splinters sucked. But because of those stubborn/painful splinters I got to witness my husband caring for our daughter. So gently he took those out of her foot without her barley even noticing. My daughters watching from afar developed a new level of trust in their Daddy.
I do believe God works like this. And you know what? Yeah, God IS good. He takes unfortunate events and uses them to bring us closer to Him. God reveals that He can remove “splinters” and more. He can make those pains better. And sometimes like my 3 year old, we don’t surrender to Him. But it doesn’t even matter. He’s going to take care of us anyway.
If you want to recognize how God has been good in your life think for a moment of some difficult times. And think about the good that came from those times.
Read between the lines of your life and you’ll see and you’ll know how present God is.
Would love to hear how God has worked in your life or would love to hear a simple moment turned spiritual.
The splintersThe culprits.When he pulled the first one out.
Yesterday morning we sat down at the dining table that is covered in scratches and memories with a black and white notepad and a blue R.S.V.P. pen and we discussed and wrote down our reflections for the year. I was originally going to do this personally but then I thought it would be super fun and interesting to listen to my daughters answers on these specific questions. I also felt it would be some overall good bonding time.
It was an opportunity to really recognize our accomplishments and things that we each want to work on.
It was very humorous listening to their responses. They each listened to each other and we giggled about things that we actually forgot until we were encouraged to remember. Now that we have finished our reflections I think we’ll look at some photos from this year and begin our 2023 visions.
We poison ourselves with these types of thoughts and non-existent scenarios. Our minds have the power to liberate us or to imprison us.
When we begin to ruminate on things that haven’t even happened, we begin to believe that it HAS HAPPENED or will eventually happen. We self sabotage ourselves, our relationships, and end up causing pain that didn’t even need to exist to begin with.
Unfortunately, we allow these types of meditations to thrive, to develop, and they could destruct us and those around us.
When you feel yourself dwelling in events that haven’t even happened, stop and recognize that it’s just a thought. Then, shoo it away.
Controlling your mind/ thoughts doesn’t happen over night, it’s a conscious effort that you have to work towards everyday.
It’s time to develop a shield to protect you from this type of thinking.
Whatever thoughts you may be meditating on, there may be something deeper as to why you’re dwelling on those thoughts.
But in the meantime when you feel those thoughts creeping in, acknowledge them and then just shoo them away like you would a fly.
Stay focused on the present and what’s in front of you right now.
“Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content”
Philippians 4:11
If we define the word worry, it reads; “give way to anxiety or unease; allow one’s mind to dwell on difficulty or troubles.” Think about that for just a moment. When we can’t control something, it causes us stress and anxiety. It leads us down the path of worrying where we end up in a field filled with fear.
How often do you worry? Many times I’m sure. About all sorts of things, right? We worry about the future, we worry about our children, we worry about bills being paid, we worry about our health, we worry about our family, we worry about many, many things.
We all worry. What you should know though is worrying is natural human survival instinct. Ultimately we worry to protect us from harm. Maybe you’re thinking, “how is worrying about my family protecting me? I’m worry about them.” Yes, that is true, however you worry to protect yourself from feeling pain. If something happens to someone in your family, you know you would suffer too. And who wants to suffer? Again, we worry to protect us. *Humans are pretty selfish, we think about ourselves a lot.*
Now worrying and living in fear is giving in to a very powerful force. Too many times we allow these emotions to completely control us and prevent us from truly living and feeling joy in our hearts. This also prevents our relationship with God from growing. Why? Because we aren’t trusting God. We aren’t trusting the creator of the entire universe. You’re not alone my friend, and you’re not on your own.
We have to lean in, we have to surrender, and we have to trust our Heavenly Father. He knows way more than we do. But, like a three year old, we are stubborn children. We want to do things on our own. Like children, we don’t want help. We don’t want to believe our Heavenly Father knows more than we do. Maybe we aren’t children, we kinda sound more like teenagers.
The spirit within us is like a muscle. As we strengthen our spirit muscle, it becomes stronger. The seed of love that God planted in all of us becomes stronger. God is love my friends. But we gotta water that seed! And we have to water others! As we continue to work on your relationship with God we become stronger than the flesh, we become stronger than those feelings and emotions that act like a wall preventing us from living in peace and harmony.
When we continue to seek God, the walls of fear and worry begin to crumble and dissolve like a soaked cookie in milk. We begin to feel peace within ourselves.
No matter what state we are in we aren’t worried or in fear because we know God loves us. We know no matter what, it’s going to be okay. We begin to understand God is in us, he surrounds us, he is reaching out and rescuing us.
But to be in that state, we have to reach our hand out. Gods hand is already present, we are the ones holding back. And once we grab ahold of the hand of God no matter what happens you’ll know in your heart God has got this. No matter what you know in the end Gods going to make everything right. God loves you. He loves you, He loves you, He loves you.
To my daughters; Demi, Ella, Wrenn. I love you girls so much. I scribbled these pieces in a notebook awhile back and I decided to share these and make it accessible to others who may need a little piece of advice.
May each of you continue to notice the lights in your life, always.
Pay attention to children. Study them and watch them with great intent. They will remind you how to live.
Always appreciate your surroundings. Compared to another, you may be living a dream.
Create friendships that will last a lifetime. Cherish that best friend you have, those kinds of friendships are like finding treasure.
It’s more than okay to cry in front of others, don’t ever be embarrassed.
Keep this in mind, “this to shall pass.” The bad things, and the good things. Embrace it. Enjoy it.
Cut the distractions and enjoy the moment.
Always respect yourself. You are so worth it, never doubt that.
You are not merely words, you are poetry.
Life will disappoint you sometimes, and you are never alone in that disappointment. What are you going to do about it?
Falling in love is worth it.
Think before you speak. Words stain like lipstick.
Don’t judge others. Just don’t. Everyone has a story and everyone has value.
Stick with the people who make you belly-ache laugh.
Love is a choice, choose love, always.
Scary moments will arise, but you can do it. Have faith in yourself, have faith in others.
Help whenever you notice the opportunity, but be cautious. Please don’t pick up hitchhikers.
Read. Read. Read. Gain knowledge and understanding. The world needs that.
Your body is perfect. Absolutely perfect and full of magic. Believe it.
Never lose sight of who you are, stay true to yourself.
Love God with all of your heart. Nobody loves you the way God does.
Get outside every chance you get and BREATHE. Close your eyes and just breathe.
Write whenever you can. Write your ideas, your dreams, things you have learned. Share it and pass it on.
Give gifts for no reason. One simple way to show another how much you value and treasure them. But the best gift is your time and attention.
Mama says use your manners but also eat with your hands and burp. It’s good for you.
Forgive yourself. Mistakes are going to happen. And when you begin reflecting, forgive yourself.
Dream big. Not everyone gets to the dream (or maybe they do) but you know what, most of the fun is the actual dreaming.
Have fun and get muddy.
Listen to others. You can hear and not be listening. Listen to what someone is saying.
Count your blessings, and count them often.
Tell the ones you love them, ALL THE TIME.
Learn about space. It’s a little terrifying, but absolutely miraculous.
Grudges are not good for the soul. Let it go baby, let it go. Practice forgiveness.
Cake for breakfast, why not? Sometimes you eat dessert first.
Be highly conscious what you are feeding your body and your soul. But make exceptions. Some day are for movies and pure comfort food.
No one is a mind reader. Steer from making assumptions and learn to talk it out.
Practice independence. It will benefit you.
You could be a billionaire or millionaire and still be unhappy. “The best things in life cannot be seen or touched but only felt with the heart.” Helen Keller.
Swallow your pride and say sorry when you need to.
You make an impact every single day. Even the days you don’t get out of bed.
Explore. Travel. NOTICE the world. There is so much beauty even in your front yard.
Cherish time, because you don’t get it back. But then again, you kind of do, just in a different way. A smell can make you time travel.
Be yourself, always. Because there is nobody who will ever be you. So embrace who you are, you beautiful creature!
Embrace your path. Comparing will only make you lose focus. You have your own purposes in this life.
Practice calmness verse becoming angry. Breathe in, breathe out. I know its hard, I know. But you are stronger than you believe.
Be a hostess, and host often. And it’s okay to go to bed and clean up the next day. Pay attention to who helps though and offers to clean up.
“I hope you dance.” by Faith Hill. Listen to that song and when you become a mom one day you’ll really understand it. I love you.
Don’t go looking for trouble, but get in a little trouble. It’s fun. Some trouble is worth it.
Pray everyday.
Let your voice be heard. You have so much to say and so much to share. You will inspire and change the world. You’ve completely changed mine.
Don’t surrender to peer pressure. If you are ever in a situation where you are feeling pressured, get out. That’s a red flag.
Fight back what you are passionate about. You’ve always had the fire. Don’t let anyone dim your light.
Don’t believe everything you hear. Ask questions or just smile. Take it with a grain of salt. And don’t things too personally. How a person treats you is a reflection on how they treat themselves. Show compassion.
Don’t ignore your intuition. But if you do, learn from it.
If you don’t want anyone to find out, there’s a good chance you shouldn’t be doing it.
Don’t be afraid to come across as foolish. Ask the questions, be the first, remain curious, try new things, and laugh at yourself.
Walk in light, be a light for others, and help others shine.
Be patient with yourself. A tree doesn’t grow that tall and give that much shade over night.
Go through your things often, and donate whatever you can. You can survive with less than you may believe.
Love life. Love it all. The bad and good. I mentioned this in number 14. Choose love over fear.
Never forget how much your parents really do love you. You are what gave them life.
In the United States for every 8 women, 1 will be diagnosed with breast cancer.
This statistic is very alarming. Being a woman and having daughters pushes me to bring more awareness to this and to encourage the females in my life to ensure they are checking themselves regularly for anything abnormal.
I discovered a lump in my underarm almost a year ago. I was referred to woman’s imaging twice and I even requested to see a specialist because I still felt unsure.
Long story short, they have come to a recent conclusion that it’s a benign lymph node. I will continue to monitor it and am doing what I believe I need to do. I am still very hopeful that it will resolve on it’s on.
But in the meantime I feel a very strong obligation to share this and to encourage women to be checking themselves. Having this lump has led me to lots of googling, believe me. But when I go through something I try to ask myself, “what is this teaching me and how can I apply this to my life?” It’s all been a life lesson.
Hence, why I am writing this blog.
Maybe some female (friend or stranger) will read this and just her reading this saved her life! I mean, who knows! But if anything I just want encourage you, my friends, to take care of yourselves as best you can.
I know cancer is not something we want to believe that can happen to us but the truth is, it can. If not you, possibly someone you love dearly. And with a 1 in 8 statistic we should be even more proactive with this, as well as, providing more awareness to the women in our lives to check themselves.
I am not a health expert. But here are the answers that I can provide to you with my experience.
When to check your breasts?
At least once a month. Best time to check for any abnormalities is right after your period, this is what a breast specialist told me. What may help is setting a monthly reminder in your phone to prevent you from forgetting.
How to self exam your breasts?
Lay down on your back and lift one arm reaching far above your head. Use your opposite hand and begin pressing 4 fingers all around your breast, armpit, and collarbone. Repeat on the other side.
You’re feeling for any lumps (some women have natural lumpy breast tissue which is why it is good to become familiar with the way your breasts feel) you’re also checking for any discharge from your nipples.
Note: if anything AT ALL seems unfamiliar it’s best to just let your doctor know.
I feel a lump, now what?
First of all, don’t panic. Lumps do not always indicate cancer. They can be cysts or even a benign lymph node if located in the underarm. And given time they may go away on their own.
Either way I encourage you to call your doctor right away and to schedule an appointment to have it further check out.
My doctor referred me to have an ultra sound, what does that mean?
Most of the time it means they really aren’t sure what the lump is. And lumps in the breast is also not something they mess around with. So they refer you to have it checked out on a different level. I personably feel it’s better to be referred somewhere then to just be dismissed and told “it feels normal”.
Don’t panic once again if your doctor is referring you. I know this can be scary, trust me. But if it is something that is concerning you want it caught as soon as possible.
If you still aren’t satisfied, ask to be referred to a breast specialist.
All I’m going to say is, your peace of mind is worth it. Just trust your intuition and I encourage you have a health advocate if you’re uncomfortable being your own.
A breast specialist will check your breasts, will feel the lump, will ask if you’re experiencing any pain, ask if the lump has grown, and she may or may not have you come back in a few more months.
And if the breast specialist doesn’t suggest you come back and the lump is still present over time, I would definitely have it checked out again. Don’t just dismiss it because the doctor says it doesn’t appear abnormal. If it’s abnormal for YOU, stay on top of it.
When it comes to your health become comfortable being uncomfortable.
Don’t be embarrassed or uncomfortable with your questions, or requesting a second opinion or additional follow ups, or bringing it up to family or friends, etc. Having peace of mind is always worth it even when it feels like a lot.
I know this kind of stuff isn’t fun to discuss believe me. It’s scary and terrifying but we are all in this together.
With all this being said, check yourself and ask the women in your life, “how often are you checking yourself.”
The Wild Gems 